Gallus

Lucian of Samosata

The Works of Lucian of Samosata, complete, with exceptions specified in thepreface, Vol. 3. Fowler, H. W. and Fowlere, F.G., translators. Oxford at the Clarendon Press, 1905.

Cock Well. Where shall we go first?. To Simon’s?

Micyllus Yes, yes, Simon first. Simonides it is, nowadays; two syllables is not enough for him since he has come into money. ... Here we are; what do I do next?

Cock Apply the feather to the bolt.

Micyllus So. Heracles! it might be a key; the door flies open.

Cock Walk in; you go first. Do you see him? He is sitting up over his accounts.

Micyllus See him! I should think I did. What a light! That lamp wants a drink. And what makes Simon so pale? He is shrivelled up to nothing. That comes of his worries; there is nothing else the matter with him, that I have heard of.

Cock Listen, and you will understand.

Simon That seventeen thousand in the hole under my bed is safe enough; not a soul saw me that time. But I believe Sosylus caught me hiding the four thousand under the manger: he is not the most industrious of grooms, he was never too fond

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of work; but he lives in that stable now. And I expect that is not all that has gone, by a long way. What was Tibius doing with those fine great kippers yesterday? And they tell me he paid no less a sum than four shillings for a pair of earrings for his wife. God help me, it’s my money they’re flinging about. I’m not easy about all that plate either: what if some one should knock a hole in the wall, and make off with it? Many is the one that envies me, and has an eye on my gold; my neighbour Micyllus is as bad as any of them.

Micyllus Hear, hear! He is as bad as Simon; he walks off with other people’s pudding-basins under his arm.

Cock Hush! we shall be caught.

Simon There’s nothing like sitting up, and having everything under one’s own eye. I’ll jump up and go my rounds.... You there! you burglar! I see you.... Ah, it is but a post; all is well. I'll pull up the gold and count it again; I may have missed something just now.... Hark! a step! I knew it; he is upon me! I am beset with enemies. The world conspires against me. Where is my dagger? Only ae me catch... —I’ll put the gold back.

Cock There: now you have seen Simon at home, Let us go on to another house, while there is still some of the night left.

Micyllus The worm! what a life! I wish all my enemies such wealth as his, I°ll just lend him a box on the ear, and then I am ready.

Simon Who was that? Some one struck me! Ah! I am robbed!

Micyllus Whine away, Simon, and sit up of nights till you are as yellow as the gold you clutch.—I should like to go to Gniphon the usurer’s next; it is quite close... . Again the door opens. to us.

Cock He is sitting up too, look. It is an anxious time with

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him; he is reckoning his interest. His fingers ate worn to the bone. Presently he will have to leave all this, and become a cockroach, or a gnat, or a bluebottle.

Micyllus Senseless brute! it will hardly be a change for the worse. He, like Simon, is pretty well thinned down by his calculations, Let us try some one else.

Cock What about your friend Eucrates? See, the door stands open; let us go in.

Micyllus An hour ago, all this was mine!

Cock Still the golden dream!—Look at the hoary old reprobate: with one of his own slaves!

Micyllus Monstrous! And his wife is not much better; she takes her paramour from the kitchen.

Cock Well? Is the inheritance to your liking? will you have i it all?

Micyllus I will starve first. Good-bye to gold and high living. Preserve me from my own servants, and I will call myself rich on twopence-halfpenny.

Cock Well, well, we must be getting home; see, it is just dawn, The rest must wait for another day.