Saturnalia

Thus says Cronosolon, [*](Named after Solon, lawgiver of Athens.) priest and prophet of Cronus, and giver of laws for his festival. What the poor must do I have written in another book and sent to them, and I am well assured that they will abide by the laws, or else they will at once be liable to the severe penalties appointed for disobedience.

Seeing me morose and walking deep in thought, he knew at once, as became a god, the reason for my grief, namely that I was cross because of my poverty, having but a single cloak, not enough for the season; for it was cold with a strong north-wind, ice and snow, and I had little defence against these things; and then since the festival was almost at hand, I saw other people getting ready their sacrifices and feasts, and I had little that makes for festival-time. Well, he came up from behind, took me by the ear, and shook me (his usual way of accosting me), and said: “Why are you looking so downhearted, Cronosolon?” “Haven’t I every reason, master, when I see disgusting and filthy rogues unbelievably rich and alone leading a comfortable life, while I and many another educated man know poverty and despair as companions? But even you, master, won’t put a stop to these things and make a more equitable

Then, when I had learnt them all, he said, “And tell them that if they are disobedient it’s not for nothing that I carry this sharp sickle here—I should be a fool to have castrated my own father, Uranus, and yet not make eunuchs of the rich who break my laws, making them servants of the Great Mother [*](Cybele.) and collectors for her, complete with flutes and cymbals.” That was his threat. So you had better not transgress his ordinances.

1. First Laws

No one is to do any business, public or private, during the festival, except what pertains to sport, luxurious living and entertainment: cooks and confectioners alone shall work. Let every man be treated equal, slave and freeman, poor and rich. No one may be ill-tempered or cross or threaten anybody. No one may audit accounts during the festival of Cronus.

2. Second Laws

Long before the festival the rich shall write on a tablet the name of each of their friends, and shall hold in readiness the cash value of a tenth of their yearly income, any surplus clothing they possess, furniture too crude for them, and a good proportion of their silver. They shall keep this ready at hand. On the day before the festival a purificatory sacrifice shall be carried round, and they shall purge their houses of meanness, avarice, greed, and all such vices that dwell with most of them. When they have purified the house, they shall sacrifice to Zeus the Giver of Wealth, Hermes the Bestower, and Apollo of the Great Gifts. Then in the late afternoon, that list of friends shall be read to them.

They shall divide the gifts according to each man’s worth, and before sunset send them to their friends. The bearers shall not exceed three or four, the most trustworthy of their servants, well advanced in years. The nature and quantity of what is sent shall be written on a slip, that neither party may suspect the bearers. Each servant shall drink one cup and then run off and make no more demands. To men of letters double quantities shall

Those who receive shall not complain, but think the gift, whatever it is, generous. A jar of wine, a hare, or a plump bird shall not be reckoned a gift for Cronus’s festival, nor shall Cronian gifts be laughed at. In return the poor scholar shall send the rich man any pleasant, convivial, old book he may have, or a work of his own, the best he can. The rich man shall receive this gift with a glad countenance and then read it at once. If he rejects it or throws it away, he shall know that he is liable to what the sickle threatens, even if what he sends is adequate. The other poor recipients shall send garlands of flowers or grains of frankincense. If a poor man sends clothing or silver or gold beyond his means to a rich man, his gift shall be declared

3. Laws for Banquets

The time for bathing shall be when the shadow of the sundial is six feet long; before the bath there shall be nuts and gaming. Each man shall take the couch where he happens to be. Rank, family, or wealth shall have little influence on privilege. All shall drink the same wine, and neither stomach trouble nor headache shall give the rich man an excuse for being the only one to drink the better quality. All shall have their meat on equal terms. The waiters shall not show favour to anyone, but shall neither be too slow nor be dismissed until the guests choose what they are to take home. Neither are large portions to be placed before one and tiny ones before another, nor a ham for one and a pig’s jaw for another—all must be treated equally.

The man who pours the wine shall keep a sharp eye on each guest from a vantage-point; he shall pay less attention to his master, and his ears shall be sharper than usual. The cups shall be of all kinds. It shall be permissible to pass a loving-cup, if desired. Everyone shall drink to everyone else, if desired, when the rich man has set the example. No one shall be made to drink if he cannot. It shall not be permissible for anyone who wishes it

1. Myself to Cronus—Greetings! I wrote to you earlier telling you what my position was and how my poverty made it likely that I alone should have no share in the festival which you proclaimed, adding this, I remember, that it was most unreasonable for some of us to have too much wealth and live in luxury and not share what they have with those who are poorer than they while others are dying of hunger, and that too when the festival of Cronus is near. Since you sent no reply then, I have thought it necessary to remind you of it again. You ought, my dear Cronus, to have abolished this inequality, made the good things accessible to everyone, and

Indeed I hear the poets saying that things were not like that in old times when you were still lord. No, the earth produced its good things for the folk without sowing and without ploughing, an ample meal ready to each man’s hand; the rivers flowed some with wine, some with milk, and others again with honey. And, above all, they say the men themselves were gold and poverty was nowhere near. As for us, we could not even be thought of as lead, but something meaner, if such there be; and for most of us food is won with toil; and poverty, want, and helplessness, and “alas!”, and “how can I get it?”, and “oh, what bad luck!” and such exclamations are plentiful, at least among us poor. We should be less distressed about it, you may be sure, if we did not see the rich living in such bliss, who, though they have such gold, such silver in their safes, though they have all that clothing and own slaves and carriage-horses and tenements and farms,