De mercede

"Where shall I make a beginning,” my friend, “and where make an end of relating”[*](Cf. Odyssey9, 14. ) all that must be done and suffered by those who take salaried posts and are put on trial in the friendship of our wealthy men—if the name of friendship may be applied to that sort of slavery on their part? Iam familiar with much, I may say most, of their experiences, not because I myself have ever tried anything of that kind, for it never became a necessity for me to try it, and, ye gods! I pray it never may ; but many of those who have blundered into this existence have talked to me freely, some, who were still in their misery, bewailing the many bitter sufferings which they were then undergoing, and others, who had broken jail, as it were, recalling not without pleasure those they had undergone ; in fact they joyed in recounting what they had escaped from.

These latter were the more trustworthy because they had gone through all the degrees of the ritual, so to speak, and had been initiated into everything from beginning to end. So it was not without interest and attention that I listened to them while they spun yarns about their shipwreck and unlooked-for deliverance, just like the men with shaven heads who gather in crowds at the temples and tell of third waves, tempests, headlands, strandings, masts carried

but when the others told of household tempests and third waves—yes, by Zeus, fifth and tenth waves, if one may say so—and how they first sailed in, with the sea apparently calm, and how many troubles they endured through the whole voyage by reason of thirst or sea-sickness or inundations of brine, and finally how they stove their unlucky lugger on a submerged ledge or a sheer pinnacle and swam ashore, poor fellows, in a wretched plight, naked and in want of every necessity—in these adventures and their account of them it seemed to me that they concealed the greater part out of shame, and voluntarily forgot it.

For my part I shall not hesitate to tell you everything, my dear Timocles, not only their stories but whatever else I find by logical inference to be characteristic of such household positions ; for I think I detected long ago that you are entertaining designs

upon that life. I detected it first one time when our conversation turned to that theme, and then someone of the company praised this kind of wage-earning, saying that men were thrice happy when, besides having the noblest of the Romans for their friends, eating expensive dinners without paying any scot, living in a handsome establishment, and travelling in all comfort and luxury, behind a span of white horses, perhaps, with their noses in the air,[*](That this is the meaning of éurriaCovres, and not “lolling at ease,” is clear from Book-Collector 21 and Downward Journey 16. ) they could also get no inconsiderable amount of pay for the friendship which they enjoyed and the kindly treatment which they received ; really everything grew without sowing and ploughing for such as they. When you heard all that and more of the same nature, I saw how you gaped at it and held your mouth very wide open for the bait.

In order, then, that as far as I am concerned I may be free from blame in future and you may not be able to say that when I saw you swallowing up that great hook along with the bait I did not hold you back or pull it away before it got into your throat or give you forewarning, but waited until I saw you dragged along by it and forcibly haled away when at last it was pulled and had set itself firmly, and then, when it was no use, stood and wept—in order that you may not say this, which would be a very sound plea if you should say it, and impossible for me to controvert on the ground that I had done no wrong by not warning you in advance—listen to everything at the outset; examine the net itself and the impermeability of the pounds beforehand, from the outside at

The whole story will be told for your sake, no doubt, in the main, but it will concern not only students of philosophy like yourself, and those who have chosen one of: the more strenuous vocations in life, but also grammarians, rhetoricians, musicians, and ina word all who think fit to enter families and serve for hire as educators. Since the experiences of all are for the most part common and similar, it is clear that the treatment accorded the philosophers, so far from being preferential, is more contumelious for being the same, if it is thought that what is good enough for the others is good enough for them, and they are not handled with any greater respect by their paymasters. Moreover, the blame for whatever the discussion itself brings out in its advance ought to be given primarily to the men themselves who do such things and secondarily to those who put up with them. I am not to blame, unless there is something censurable in truth and frankness.

As to those who make up the rest of the mob, such as athletic instructors and parasites, ignorant, pettyminded, naturally abject fellows, it is not worth while to try to turn them away from such household positions, for they would not heed, nor indeed is it proper to blame them for not leaving their paymasters,

It seems to me that I should do well to examine in advance the motives for which some men go into this sort of life and show that they are not at all urgent or necessary. In that way their defence and the primary object of their voluntary slavery would be done away with in advance. Most of them plead their poverty and their lack of necessities, and think that in this way they have set up an adequate screen for their desertion to this life. They consider that it quite suffices them if they say that they act pardonably in seeking to escape poverty, the bitterest thing in life. Then Theognis comes to hand, and time and again we hear : “All men held in subjection to Poverty,”[*](ἄνδρ᾽ ἀγαθὸν πενίη πάντων δάμνησι μάλιστα,καὶ γήρως πολιοῦ, Κύρνε, καὶ ἠπιάλου,ἣν δὴ χρὴ φεύγοντα καὶ ἐς βαθυκήτεα πόντονῥιπτεῖν καὶ πετρέων, Κύρνε, κατ᾽ ἠλιβάτων.καὶ γὰρ ἀνὴρ πενίῃ δεδμημένος οὔτε τι εἰπεῖνοὐθ᾽ ἕρξαι δύναται, γλῶσσα δέ οἱ δέδεται.Theognis 173 ff.)

If I saw that they truly found any refuge from poverty in such household positions, I should not quibble with them in behalf of excessive liberty ; but when they receive what resembles “the diet of invalids,” as our splendid orator once said,[*](Demosthenes3, 33. ) how can one avoid thinking that even in this particular they are ill advised, inasmuch as their condition in life always remains the same? They are always poor, they must continue to receive, there is nothing put by, no surplus to save: on the contrary, what is given, even if it is given, even if payment is received in full, is all spent to the last copper and without satisfying their need. It would have been better not to excogitate any such measures, which keep poverty going by simply giving first aid against it, but such as will do away with it altogether—yes, and to that end perhaps even .to plunge into the deep-bosomed sea if one must, Theognis, and down precipitous cliffs, as you ~ say. But if a man who is always poor and needy and on an allowance thinks that thereby he has escaped poverty, I do not know how one can avoid thinking that such a man deludes himself.

Others say that poverty in itself would not frighten or cow them.if they could get their daily bread by working like the rest, but as things are, since their bodies have been debilitated by old age or by illnesses, they have resorted to this form of wage-earning, which is the easiest. Come, then, let us see if what they say is true and they secure their gifts easily, without working much, or any more than the rest. It would indeed be a godsend to get money readily

One motive remains, which is exceedingly genuine but not mentioned at all by them, namely, that they plunge into these households for the sake of pleasure and on account of their many extravagant expectations, dazzled by the wealth of gold and silver, enraptured over the dinners and the other forms of indulgence, and assured that they will immediately drink gold in copious draughts, and that nobody will stop their mouths. That is what seduces them and makes them slaves instead of freemen—not lack of necessaries, as they alleged, but desire for unnecessaries and envy of that abundance and luxury. Therefore, like unsuccessful and unhappy lovers, they fall into the hands of shrewd, experienced minions who treat them superciliously, taking good care that they shall always love them, but not permitting them ta enjoy the objects of their affection even to the extent of a meagre kiss; for they know that success will involve the dissolution of love. So they hold that under lock and key and guard it jealously, but otherwise they keep their lover always hopeful, since they fear that despair may wean him

Now to put up with everything on account of desire for pleasure is perhaps not altogether blameworthy, even excusable, if a man likes pleasure and makes it his aim above all else to partake of it. Yet perhaps it is shameful and ignoble for him to sell himself on that account ; for the pleasure of freedom is far sweeter. Nevertheless, let us grant that he would be excusable in a measure, if he obtained it. But to put up with many unpleasantnesses just on account of the hope of pleasure is ridiculous in my opinion and senseless, particularly when men see that the discomforts are definite and patent in advance and inevitable, while the pleasure that is hoped for, whatever it is, has never yet come in all the past, and what is more, is not even likely to come in the future, if one should figure the matter out on the basis of hard fact. The companions: of Odysseus neglected all else because they were eating the lotus and found it sweet, and they contemned what was honourable because they contrasted it with their immediate pleasure ; therefore it was not entirely unreasonable of them to forget honour while their souls dwelt upon that sweetness. But for a man in hunger to stand beside another who eats his fill of lotus without giving him any, and to be chained

Well, the motives which attract them to these household positions, which cause them to put themselves eagerly into the power of the rich to treat as they will, are these or as near as may be to these, unless one should think it worth while to mention also those men who are impelled by the mere name of associating with men of noble family and high social position. There are people who think that even this confers distinction and exalts them above the masses, just as in my own case, were it even the Great King, merely to associate with him and to be seen associating with him without getting any real benefit out of the association would not be acceptable to me.

So much for their object. Let us now consider between ourselves what they put up with before they are received and gain their end, and what they endure when they are fairly in the thing, and to cap the climax, what the outcome of the drama proves to be. For surely it cannot be said that even if all this is unworthy, at least it is easy to get and will not call for much trouble; that you need only wish, and then the whole thing is accomplished for you without any effort. No, it calls for much running hither and thither, and for continual camping on doorsteps ; you must get up early and wait about ; meanwhile you are elbowed, you are kept locked out, you are sometimes thought impudent and annoying, you are

But your man does not even look at you for many days on end. And if ever you have a rare stroke of luck—

if he sees you, calls you up and asks you a casual question, then, ah! then you sweat profusely, your head swims confusedly, you tremble inopportunely, and the company laughs at you for your embarrassment. Many a time, when you should reply to the question: “Who was the king of the Achaeans,” you say, “They had a thousand ships!” Good men call this modesty, forward men cowardice, and unkind men lack of breeding. So, having found the beginning of friendly relations very unstable footing, you go away doomed by your own verdict to great despair.

When “many a sleepless night you have pillowed” and have lived through “many a blood-stained day,”[*](Iliad9, 325. ) not for the sake of Helen or of Priam’s Trojan citadel, but the five obols that you hope for, and when you have secured the backing of a tragedy god,[*](Some person, as opportune and powerful as a deus ex machina, to press your suit. ) there follows an examination to see if you are learned in the arts. For the rich man that way of

No doubt there are many who side against you and favour others in your stead, and each of them stealthily shoots at you, so to speak, from ambush. Then too imagine a man with a long beard and grey hair undergoing examination to see if he knows anything worth while, and some thinking that he does, others that he does not!

Then a period intervenes, and your whole past life is pried into. If a fellow-countryman. out of jealousy or a neighbour offended for some insignificant reason says, when questioned, that you are a follower of women or boys, there they have it ! the witness speaks by the book of Zeus; but if all with one accord commend you, they are considered questionable, dubious, and suborned. You must have great good fortune, then, and no opposition at all; for that is the only way in which you can win.

Well, suppose you have been fortunate in everything beyond your fondest hopes. The master himself has commended your discussions, and those of

You have won, then, lucky man, and have gained the Olympic crown—nay, you have taken Babylon or stormed the citadel of Sardis ; you shall have the horn of Plenty and fill your pails with pigeon’s milk. It is indeed fitting that in return for all your labours you should have the very greatest of blessings, in order that your crown may not be mere leaves ; that your salary should be set at a considerable figure and paid you when you need it, without ado; that in other ways you should be honoured beyond ordinary folk; that you should get respite from your former exertions and muddiness and running about and loss of sleep, and that in accordance with your prayer you should “sleep with your legs stretched out,”[*](A proverbial expression for ‘“taking it easy.” ) doing only what you were engaged for at the outset and what you are paid for. That ought to be the way of it, Timocles, and there would be no great harm in stooping and bearing the yoke if it were light and comfortable and, best of all, gilded' But the case is very different—yes, totally different. There are thousands of things insupportable to a free man that take place even after one has entered the household. Consider for yourself, as you hear a list of them, whether anyone could put up with them who is even to the slightest degree cultured.

I shall begin, if you like, with the first dinner which will be

Very soon, then, someone calls, bringing an invitation to the dinner, a servant not unfamiliar with the world, whom you must first propitiate by slipping at least five drachmas into his hand casually so as not to appear awkward. He puts on airs and murmurs: “Tut, tut ! I take money from you?” ane : “Heracles! I hope it may never come to that !"; but in the end he is prevailed upon and goes away with a broad grin at your expense. Providing yourself with clean clothing and dressing yourself as neatly as you can, you pay your visit to the bath and go, afraid of getting there before the rest, for that would be gauche, just as to come last would be ill-mannered. So you wait until the middle moment of the right time, and then go in. He receives you with much distinction, and someone takes you in charge and gives you a place at table a little above the rich man, with perhaps two of his old friends.

As though you had entered the mansion of Zeus, you admire everything and are amazed at all that is done, for everything is strange and unfamiliar to you. The servants stare at you, and everybody in the company keeps an eye on you to see what you are going to do. Even the rich man himself is not without concern on this score ; he has previously directed some of the servants to watch whether you often gaze from afar at his sons or his wife. The attendants of your fellow-guests, seeing that you are impressed, crack jokes about your unfamiliarity with what is doing and conjecture

In general, you are in a chaotic state and your soul is full of agitation, for you are lost in amazement at everything that goes on. Now you call Dives lucky for his gold and his ivory and all his luxury, and now you pity yourself for imagining that you are alive when you are really nothing at all. Sometimes, too, it comes into your head that you are going to lead an enviable life, since you will revel in all that and share in it equally; you expect to enjoy perpetual Bacchic revels. Perhaps, too, pretty boys waiting upon you and faintly smiling at you paint the picture of your future life in more attractive colours, so that you are forever quoting that line of Homer:

1. Small blame to the fighters of Troy and the brightgreaved men of Achaea[*](Said of Helen by the Trojan elders. They continue, ; That for a woman like this they long have endured tribulations.Iliad 3, 157 )

Moreover, that toast has made many of his old friends jealous of you, some of whom you had previously offended when the places at table were assigned because you, who had only just come, were given precedence over men who for years had drained the dregs of servitude. So at once they begin to talk about you after this fashion: “That was still left for us in addition to our other afflictions, to play second fiddle to men who have just come into the household, and it is only these Greeks who have the freedom of the city of Rome. And yet, why is it that they are preferred to us? Isn't it true that they think they confer a tremendous benefit by turning wretched phrases ?”’ Another says: “Why, didn’t you see how much he drank, and how he gathered in what was set before him and devoured it? The fellow has no manners, and is starved to the limit; even in his dreams he never had his fill of white bread, not to speak of guinea fowl] or pheasants, of which he has hardly left us the bones:”’ A third observes: “You silly asses, in less than five days you will see him here in the midst of us making these same complaints. Just now, like a new pair of shoes, he is receiving acertain amount of consideration and attention, but when he has been used again and again and is smeared with mud, he will be thrown under the bed in a wretched state, covered with vermin like the rest of us.”

Well, as I say, they go on about you indefinitely in

Anyhow, that whole dinner-party is yours, and most of the conversation is about you. For your own part, as you have drunk more than enough subtle, insidious wine because you ‘were not used to it, you have been uneasy for a long time and are in a bad way: yet it is not good form to leave early and not safe to stay where you are. So, as the drinking is prolonged and subject after subject is discussed and entertainment after entertainment is brought in (for he wants to show you all his wealth !), you undergo great punishment ; you cannot see what takes place, and if this or that lad who is held in very great esteem sings or plays, you cannot hear; you applaud perforce while you pray that an earthquake may tumble the whole establishment into a heap or that a great fire may be reported, so that the party may break up at last.

So goes, then, my friend, that first and sweetest of dinners, which to me at least is no sweeter than thyme and white salt eaten in freedom, when I like and as much as I like.

To spare you the tale of the flatulency that follows and the sickness during the night, early in the morning you two will be obliged to come to terms with one another about your stipend, how much you are to receive and at what time of year. So with two or three of his friends present, he summons you, bids you to be seated, and opens the conversation: ‘ You have already seen what our establishment is like, and that there is not a bit of pomp and circumstance in it, but everything is unostentatious, prosaic, and ordiriary. You must feel that we shall have everything in

By saying this and putting you all in a flutter with expectations, he has made you submissive to him. You formerly dreamed of thousands and millions and whole farms and tenements, and you are somewhat conscious of his meanness; nevertheless, you welcome his promise with dog-like joy, and think his “We shall have everything in common”’ reliable and truthful, not knowing that this sort of thing

1. “Wetteth the lips, to be sure, but the palate it leaveth unwetted.