Banquet

But have you failed to observe, questioned Antisthenes, that the rhapsodes,[*](These professional reciters of epic poetry are represented as being criticized by Socrates, in much the same way as here, in Xenophon’s Memorabilia, IV. ii. 10 and in Plato’s Ion.) too, all know these poems? How could I, he replied, when I listen to their recitations nearly every day? Well, do you know any tribe of men, went on the other, more stupid than the rhapsodes? No, indeed, answered Niceratus; not I, I am sure. No, said Socrates; and the reason is clear: they do not know the inner meaning of the poems. But you have paid a good deal of money to Stesimbrotus, Anaximander, and many other Homeric critics, so that nothing of their valuable teaching can have escaped your knowledge.

But what about you, Critobulus? he continued. What do you take greates pride in? In beauty, he replied. What? exclaimed Socrates. Are you too going to be able to maintain that you can make us better, and by means of your beauty? Why, otherwise, it is clear enough that I shall cut but an indifferent figure.[*](Critobulus seems to imply that beauty is his only resource.)

And you, Antisthenes, said Socrates, what do you take pride in? In wealth, he replied. Hermogenes asked him whether he had a large amount of money; he swore that he did not have even a penny. You own a great deal of land, then? Well, perhaps it might prove big enough, said he, for Autolycus here to sand himself in.[*](The reference is to the handful or so of dry sand that an athlete put on after oiling his skin.)

It looks as if we should have to hear from you, too. And how about you, Charmides? he continued. What do you take pride in? What pride, said he, on the contrary, is in my poverty. A charming thing, upon my word! exclaimed Socrates. It seldom causes envy or is a bone of contention; and it is kept safe without the necessity of a guard, and grows sturdier by neglect!

But what of you, Socrates? said Callias. What are you proud of? Socrates drew up his face into a very solemn expression, and answered, The trade of procurer. After the rest had had a laugh at him, Very well, said he, you may laugh, but I know that I could make a lot of money if I cared to follow the trade.

As for you, said Lycon, addressing Philip, it is obvious that your pride is in your jesting. And my pride is better founded, I think, replied Philip, than that of Callippides, the actor,[*](Callippides was regarded at this time and afterward as perhaps the most illustrious tragic actor of his time.) who is consumed with vanity because he can fill the seats with audiences that weep.

Will you also not tell us, Lycon, said Antisthenes, what it is that you take pride in? Don’t you all know, he answered, that it is in my son here? And as for him, said one, it is plain that he is proud at having taken a prize. At this Autolycus blushed and said, No, indeed, not that.

All looked at him, delighted to hear him speak, and one asked, What is it, then, Autolycus, that you are proud of? and he answered, My father, and with the words nestled close against him. When Callias saw this, Do you realize, Lycon, said he, that you are the richest man in the world? No, indeed, the other replied, I certainly do not know that. Why, are you blind to the fact that you would not part with your son for the wealth of the Great King? I am caught, was the answer, red-handed; it does look as if I were the richest man in the world.

What about you, Hermogenes? said Niceratus. What do you delight in most? In the goodness and the power of my friends, he answered, and in the fact that with all their excellence they have regard for me. Thereupon all eyes were turned toward him, and many speaking at once asked him whether he would not discover these friends to them; and he answered that he would not be at all loath to do so.

At this point Socrates said: I suspect that it remains now for each one of us to prove that what he engaged himself to champion is of real worth. You may hear me first, said Callias. While I listen to your philosophical discussions of what righteousness is, I am all the time actually rendering men more righteous. How so, my good friend? asked Socrates. Why, by giving them money.

Then Antisthenes got up and in a very argumentative fashion interrogated him. Where do you think men harbour their righteousness, Callias, in their souls or in their purses?In their souls, he replied. So you make their souls more righteous by putting money into their purses? I surely do. How? Because they know that they have the wherewithal to buy the necessities of life, and so they are reluctant to expose themselves to the hazards of crime.

And do they repay you, he asked, the money that they get from you? Heavens, no! he replied. Well, do they substitute thanks for money payment? No, indeed, nor that either, he said. On the contrary, some of them have an even greater dislike of me than before they got the money. It is remarkable, said Antisthenes, looking fixedly at him as though he had him in a corner, that you can make them righteous toward others but not toward yourself.

What is there remarkable about that? asked Callias. Do you not see plenty of carpenters, also, and architects that build houses for many another person but cannot do it for themselves, but live in rented houses? Come now, my captious friend, take your medicine and own that you are beaten.

By all means, said Socrates, let him do so. For even the soothsayers have the reputation, you know, of prophesying the future for others but of not being able to foresee their own fate. Here the discussion of this point ended.

Then Niceratus remarked: You may now hear me tell wherein you will be improved by associating with me. You know, doubtless, that the sage Homer has written about practically everything pertaining to man. Any one of you, therefore, who wishes to acquire the art of the householder, the political leader, or the general, or to become like Achilles or Ajax or Nestor or Odysseus, should seek my favour, for I understand all these things.Ha! said Antisthenes; do you understand how to play the king, too, knowing, as you do, that Homer praised Agamemnon[*](Iliad, iii. 179.) for being

both goodly king and spearman strong

1. Himself lean lightly to the left within
2. The polished car, the right-hand trace-horse goad,
3. Urge him with shouts, and let him have the reins.
[*](Hom. Il. 23.335-337)

And beside this I know something else, which you may test immediately. For Homer says somewhere:

An onion, too, a relish for the drink.