Regum et imperatorum apophthegmata

CN. POMPEIUS. Cn. Pompeius was as much beloved by the Romans as his father was hated. When he was young, he wholly sided with Sylla, and before he had borne many offices or was chosen into the senate, he enlisted many soldiers in Italy. When Sylla sent for him, he returned answer, that he would not muster his forces in the presence of his general, unfleshed and without spoils; nor did he come before that in several fights he had overcome the captains of the enemy. He was sent by Sylla lieutenant-general

into Sicily, and being told that the soldiers turned out of the way and forced and plundered the country, he sealed the swords of such as he sent abroad, and punished all other stragglers and wanderers. He had resolved to put the Mamertines, that were of the other side, all to the sword; but Sthenius the orator told him, He would do injustice if he should punish many that were innocent for the sake of one that was guilty; and that he himself was the person that persuaded his friends and forced his enemies to side with Marius. Pompey admired the man, and said, he could not blame the Mamertines for being inveigled by a person who preferred his country beyond his own life; and forgave both the city and Sthenius too. When he passed into Africa against Domitius and overcame him in a great battle, the soldiers saluted him Imperator. He answered, he could not receive that honor, so long as the fortification of the enemy’s camp stood undemolished; upon this, although it rained hard, they rushed on and plundered the camp. At his return, among other courtesies and honors wherewith Sylla entertained him, he styled him The Great; yet when he was desirous to triumph, Sylla would not consent, because he was not yet chosen into the senate. But when Pompey said to those that were about him, Sylla doth not know that more worship the rising than the setting sun, Sylla cried aloud, Let him triumph. Hereat Servilius, one of the nobles, was displeased; the soldiers also withstood his triumph, until he had bestowed a largess among them. But when Pompey replied, I would rather forego my triumph than flatter them,—Now, said Servilius, I see Pompey is truly great and worthy of a triumph. It was a custom in Rome, that knights who had served in the wars the time appointed by the laws should bring their horse into the forum before the censors, and there give an account of their warfare and the commanders under whom they had served. Pompey, then consul, brought also his horse before the censors, Gellius and Lentulus; and when they asked him, as the manner is, whether he had served all his campaigns, All, said he, and under myself as general. Having gotten into his hands the writings of Sertorius in Spain, among which were letters from several leading men in Rome, inviting Sertorius to Rome to innovate and change the government, he burnt them all, by that means giving opportunity to ill-affected persons to repent and mend their manners. Phraates, king of Parthia, sent to him requesting that the river Euphrates might be his bounds. He answered, the Romans had rather the right should be their bounds towards Parthia. L. Lucullus, after he left the army, gave himself up to pleasure and luxury, jeering at Pompey for busying himself in affairs unsuitable to his age. He answered, that government became old age better than luxury. In a fit of sickness, his physician prescribed him to eat a thrush; but when none could be gotten, because they were out of season, one said, that Lucullus had some, for he kept them all the year. It seems then, said he, Pompey must not live, unless Lucullus play the glutton; and dismissing the physician, he ate such things as were easy to be gotten. In a great dearth at Rome, he was chosen by title overseer of the market, but in reality lord of sea and land, and sailed to Africa, Sardinia, and Sicily. Having procured great quantities of wheat, he hastened back to Rome; and when by reason of a great tempest the pilots were loath to hoist sail, he went first aboard himself, and commanding the anchor to be weighed, cried out aloud, There is a necessity of sailing, but there is no necessity of living. When the difference betwixt him and Caesar broke out, and Marcellinus, one of those whom he had preferred, revolted to Caesar and inveighed much against Pompey in the senate; Art thou not ashamed, said he, Marcellinus, to reproach me, who taught you to speak when you were dumb, and fed you full even to vomiting when you were starved? To Cato, who severely blamed him because, when he had often informed him of the growing power of Caesar, such as was dangerous to a democracy, he took little notice of it, he answered, Your counsels were more presaging, but mine more friendly. Concerning himself he freely professed, that he entered all his offices sooner than he expected, and resigned them sooner than was expected by others. After the fight at Pharsalia, in his flight towards Egypt, as he was going out of the ship into the fisher-boat the king sent to attend him, turning to his wife and son, he said nothing to them beside those two verses of Sophocles:

1. Whoever comes within a tyrant’s door
2. Becomes his slave, though he were free before.

As he came out of the boat, when he was struck with a sword, he said nothing; but gave one groan, and covering his head submitted to the murderers.

CICERO. Cicero the orator, when his name was played upon and his friends advised him to change it, answered, that he would make the name of Cicero more honorable than the name of the Catos, the Catuli, or the Scauri. He dedicated to the Gods a silver cup with a cover, with the first letters of his other names, and instead of Cicero a chick-pea (cicer) engraven. Loud bawling orators, he said, were driven by their weakness to noise, as lame men to take horse. Verres had a son that in his youth had not well secured his chastity; yet he reviled Cicero for his effeminacy, and called him catamite. Do you not know, said he, that children are to be rebuked at home within doors? Metellus Nepos told him he had slain more by his testimony than he had saved by his pleadings. You say true, said he, my honesty exceeds my eloquence. When Metellus asked him who his father was, Your mother, said he, hath made that question a harder one for you to answer

than for me. For she was unchaste, while Metellus himself was a light, inconstant, and passionate man. The same Metellus, when Diodotus his master in rhetoric died, caused a marble crow to be placed on his monument; and Cicero said, he returned his master a very suitable gratuity, who had taught him to fly but not to declaim. Hearing that Vatinius, his enemy and otherwise a lewd person, was dead, and the next day that he was alive, A mischief on him, said he, for lying. To one that seemed to be an African, who said he could not hear him when he pleaded, And yet, said he, your ears are of full bore. He had summoned Popilius Cotta, an ignorant blockhead that pretended to the law, as a witness in a cause; and when he told the court he knew nothing of the business, On my conscience, I’ll warrant you, said Cicero, he thinks you ask him a question in the law. Verres sent a golden sphinx as a present to Hortensius the orator, who told Cicero, when he spoke obscurely, that he was not skilled in riddles. That’s strange, said he, since you have a sphinx in your house. Meeting Voconius with his three daughters that were hard favored, he told his friends softly that verse,—

1. Children he hath got,
2. Though Apollo favored not.

When Faustus the son of Sylla, being very much in debt, set up a writing that he would sell his goods by auction, he said, I like this proscription better than his father’s. When Pompey and Caesar fell out, he said, I know whom to fly from, but I know not whom to fly to. He blamed Pompey for leaving the city, and for imitating Themistocles rather than Pericles, when his affairs did not resemble the former’s but the latter’s. He changed his mind and went over to Pompey, who asked him where he left his soninlaw Piso. He answered, With your father-in-law Caesar. To one that went over from Caesar to Pompey, saying that in his haste and eagerness he had left his horse behind him,

he said, You have taken better care of your horse than of yourself. To one that brought news that the friends of Caesar looked sourly, You do as good as call them, said he, Caesar’s enemies. After the battle in Pharsalia, when Pompey was fled, one Nonius said they had seven eagles left still, and advised to try what they would do. Your advice, said he, were good, if we were to fight with jackdaws. Caesar, now conqueror, honorably restored the statues of Pompey that were thrown down; whereupon Cicero said, that Caesar by erecting Pompey’s statues had secured his own. He set so high a value on oratory, and did so lay out himself especially that way, that having a cause to plead before the centumviri, when the day approached and his slave Eros brought him word it was deferred until the day following, he presently made him free.

C. CAESAR. Caius Caesar, when he was a young man, fled from Sylla, and fell into the hands of pirates, who first demanded of him a sum of money; and he laughed at the rogues for not understanding his quality, and promised them twice as much as they asked him. Afterwards, when he was put into custody until he raised the money, he commanded them to be quiet and silent while he slept. While he was in prison, he made speeches and verses which he read to them, and when they commended them but coldly, he called them barbarians and blockheads, and threatened them in jest that he would hang them. But after a while he was as good as his word; for when the money for his ransom was brought and he discharged, he gathered men and ships out of Asia, seized the pirates and crucified them. At Rome he stood to be chief priest against Catulus, a man of great interest among the Romans. To his mother, who brought him to the gate, he said, To-day, mother, you will have your son high priest or banished. He divorced his wife Pompeia, because she was reported to be over

familiar with Clodius; yet when Clodius was brought to trial upon that account, and he was cited as a witness, he spake no evil against his wife; and when the accuser asked him, Why then did you divorce her?—Because, said he, Caesar’s wife ought to be free even from suspicion. As he was reading the exploits of Alexander, he wept and told his friends, He was of my age when he conquered Darius, and I hitherto have done nothing. He passed by a little inconsiderable town in the Alps, and his friends said, they wondered whether there were any contentions and tumults for offices in that place. He stood, and after a little pause answered, I had rather be the first in this town than second in Rome. He said, great and surprising enterprises were not to be consulted upon, but done. And coming against Pompey out of his province of Gaul, he passed the river Rubicon, saying, Let every die be thrown. After Pompey fled to sea from Rome, he went to take money out of the treasury: when Metellus, who had the charge of it, forbade him and shut it against him, he threatened to kill him; whereupon Metellus being astonished, he said to him, This, young man, is harder for me to say than to do. When his soldiers were having a tedious passage from Brundisium to Dyrrachium, unknown to all he went aboard a small vessel, and attempted to pass the sea; and when the vessel was in danger of being overset, he discovers himself to the pilot, crying out, Trust Fortune, and know that you carry Caesar. But the tempest being vehement, his soldiers coming about him and expostulating passionately with him, asking whether he distrusted them and was looking for another army, would not suffer him to pass at that time. They fought, and Pompey had the better of it; but instead of following his blow he retreated to his camp. To-day, said Caesar, the enemy had the victory, but none of them know how to conquer. Pompey commanded his army to stand in array at Pharsalia in their place, and to receive the charge from the enemy. In this Caesar said he was out, thereby suffering the eagerness of his soldiers’ spirits, when they were up and inspired with rage and success, in the midst of their career to languish and expire. After he routed Pharnaces Ponticus at the first assault, he wrote thus to his friends, I came, I saw, I conquered.[*](Ἠλθον, εἶδον, ἐνίκησα,veni, vidi, vici.) After Scipio was worsted in Africa and fled, and Cato had killed himself, he said: I envy thee thy death, O Cato! since thou didst envy me the honor of saving thee. Antonius and Dolabella were suspected by his friends, who advised him to secure them; he answered, I fear none of those fat and lazy fellows, but those pale and lean ones,— meaning Brutus and Cassius. As he was at supper, the discourse was of death, which sort was the best. That, said he, which is unexpected.

CAESAR AUGUSTUS. Caesar, who was the first surnamed Augustus, being yet young, demanded of Antony the twenty-five millions of money[*](It is doubtful what amount is here intended by Plutarch. If sesterces are understood, the amount is much less than it is commonly stated; and even if we understand drachmas (or denarii), we shall still fall below the amount commonly given, which is 700,000,000 sesterces (or about $28,000,000). See, for example, Veil Paterc. II. 60, 4: Sestertium septiens miliens. (G.)) which he had taken out of the house of Julius Caesar when he was slain, that he might pay the Romans the legacies he had left them, every man seventy-five drachms. But when Antony detained the money, and bade him, if he were wise, let fall his demand, he sent the crier to offer his own paternal estate for sale, and therewith discharged the legacies; by which means he procured a general respect to himself, and to Antony the hatred of the Romans. Rymetalces, king of Thrace, forsook Antony and went over to Caesar; but bragging immoderately in his drink, and nauseously reproaching his new confederates, Caesar drank to one of the other kings, and told him, I love treason but do not commend

traitors. The Alexandrians, when he had taken their city, expected great severity from him; but when he came upon the judgment-seat, he placed Arius the Alexandrian by him and told them: I spare this city, first because it is great and beautiful, secondly for the sake of its founder, Alexander, and thirdly for the sake of Arius my friend. When it was told him that Eros, his steward in Egypt, having bought a quail that beat all he came near and was never worsted by any, had roasted and eaten it, he sent for him; and when upon examination he confessed the fact, he ordered him to be nailed on the mast of the ship. He removed Theodorus, and in his stead made Arius his factor in Sicily, whereupon a petition was presented to him, in which was written, Theodorus of Tarsus is either a baldpate or a thief, what is your opinion? Caesar read it, and subscribed, I think so. Mecaenas, his intimate companion, presented him yearly on his birthday with a piece of plate. Athenodorus the philosopher, by reason of his old age, begged leave that he might retire from court, which Caesar granted; and as Athenodorus was taking his leave of him, Remember, said he, Caesar, whenever you are angry, to say or do nothing before you have repeated the four-and-twenty letters to yourself. Whereupon Caesar caught him by the hand and said, I have need of your presence still; and he kept him a year longer, saying, The reward of silence is a secure reward. He heard Alexander at the age of thirty-two years had subdued the greatest part of the world and was at a loss what he should do with the rest of his time. But he wondered Alexander should not think it a lesser labor to gain a great empire than to set in order what he had gotten. He made a law concerning adulterers, wherein was determined how the accused were to be tried and how the guilty were to be punished. Afterwards, meeting with a young man that was reported to have been familiar with his daughter Julia, being enraged he struck him with his hands; but when the young man cried out, O Caesar! you have made a law, he was so troubled at it that he refrained from supper that day. When he sent Caius his daughter’s son into Armenia, he begged of the Gods that the favor of Pompey, the valor of Alexander, and his own fortune might attend him. He told the Romans he would leave them one to succeed him in the government that never consulted twice in the same affair, meaning Tiberius. He endeavored to pacify some young men that were imperious in their offices; and when they gave little heed to him, but still kept a stir, Young men, said he, hear an old man to whom old men hearkened when he was young. Once, when the Athenians had offended him, he wrote to them from Aegina: I suppose you know I am angry with you, otherwise I had not wintered at Aegina. Besides this, he neither said nor did any thing to them. One of the accusers of Eurycles prated lavishly and unreasonably, proceeding so far as to say, If these crimes, O Caesar, do not seem great to you, command him to repeat to me the seventh book of Thucydides; wherefore Caesar being enraged commanded him to prison. But afterwards, when he heard he was descended from Brasidas, he sent for him again, and dismissed him with a moderate rebuke. When Piso built his house from top to bottom with great exactness, You cheer my heart, said he, who build as if Rome would be eternal.