Dialogi mortuorum

Zenophantus Ah, Callidemides, and how did you come by your end? As for me, I was free of Dinias’s table, and there died of a surfeit; but that is stale news; you were there, of course.

Callidemides Yes, I was. Now there was an element of surprise about my fate. I suppose you know that old Ptoeodorus?

Zenophantus The rich man with no children, to whom you gave most of your company?

Callidemides That is the man; he had promised to leave me his heir, and I used to show my appreciation. However, it went on such a time; Tithonus was a juvenile to him; so I found a short cut to my property. I bought a potion, and agreed with the butler that next time his master called for wine (he is a pretty stiff drinker) he should have this ready in a cup and present it; and I was pledged to reward the man with his freedom.

Zenophantus And what happened? this is interesting.

Callidemides When we came from bath, the young fellow had two cups ready, one with the poison for Ptoeodorus, and the other for me; but by some blunder he handed me the poisoned cup,

Zenophantus Well, it was such a humorous exit. And how did the old man behave?

Callidemides He was dreadfully distressed for the moment; then he saw, I suppose, and laughed as much as you over the butler’s trick,

Zenophantus Ah, short cuts are no better for you than for other people, you see; the high road would have been safer, if not quite so quick.