Cyropaedia

Hush said Cyrus. don’t call these men humbugs. For to me, the name humbug seems to apply to those who pretend that they are richer than they are or braver than they are, and to those who promise to do what they cannot do, and that, too, when it is evident that they do this only for the sake of getting something or making some gain. But those who invent stories to amuse their companions and not for their own gain nor at the expense of their hearers nor to the injury of any one, why should these men not be called witty and entertaining rather than humbugs?

Thus Cyrus defended those who had furnished[*](Is it better to make men laugh than weep?) the fun, and the captain himself who had told the anecdote about his platoon said: Verily, Aglaïtadas, you might find serious fault with us, if we tried to make you weep, like some authors who invent touching incidents in their poems and stories and try to move us to tears; but now, although you yourself know that we wish to entertain you and not to do you any harm at all, still you heap such reproaches upon us.

Aye, by Zeus, said Aglaïtadas, and justly, too, since he that makes his friends laugh seems to me to do them much less service than he who makes them weep; and if you will look at it rightly, you, too, will find that I speak the truth. At any rate, fathers develop self-control in their sons by making them weep, and teachers impress good lessons upon their pupils in the same way, and the laws, too, turn the citizens to justice by making them weep. But could you say that those who make us laugh either do good to our bodies or make our minds any more fitted for the management of our private business or of the affairs of state?

Hereupon Hystaspas answered somewhat as follows: If you will heed me, Aglaïtadas, you will freely expend this very valuable commodity upon your enemies and will try to set them to weeping; but upon us and your friends here you will please to lavish this cheap article, laughter. And you can, for I know you must have a great quantity of it stored up; for you have never spent it upon yourself nor do you ever afford any laughter for your friends or for your enemies if you can help it. So you have no excuse for begrudging us a laugh.What said Aglaïtadas; do you really think, Hystaspas, to get a laugh out of me?Well, by Zeus, said the other captain, he is a very foolish fellow, let me tell you, if he does; for I believe one might rub fire out of you more easily than provoke a laugh from you.

At this, of course, the rest laughed; for they knew his character, and Aglaïtadas himself smiled at the sally. And Cyrus seeing him brighten up said: It is not right, captain, for you to corrupt our most serious man by persuading him to laugh, and that, too, said he, when he is such a foe to laughter.

With that, the subject was dropt. But at this point Chrysantas spoke as follows.

Cyrus, said he, and all you here present, I observe, for my part, that some have come out with us who are of superior merit, others who are less deserving than we. Now, if we meet with success, these will all expect to have share and share alike. And yet I[*](The proper basis for distributing prize money) do not believe that anything in the world is more unfair than for the bad and good to be awarded equal shares. Well, then, in the name of the gods, my men, Cyrus replied to this, will it not be a very good thing for us to suggest to the army a debate on this question: shall we, in case God gives us any success to reward our toils, give to all an equal share or shall we take into consideration each man’s services and bestow increased rewards upon him commensurate with them?

And what is the use, said Chrysantas, of starting a discussion concerning this matter? Why not rather announce that you propose to do thus and so? Pray, did you not announce the games and offer the prizes that way? Yes, by Zeus, said Cyrus; but this is not a parallel case. For what the men obtain by fighting, that, I suppose, they will consider their own common property; but the command of the army they still consider fairly to be mine, so that when I appoint the judges, I am sure they think I am within my rights.

And do you really believe, said Chrysantas, that the mass meeting would adopt a resolution that each one should not have an equal share, but that the best should have the preference both in honours and gifts? Yes said Cyrus, I do, partly because we recommend[*](Rewards according to merit) it, and partly because it is mean to oppose a proposition that the one who suffers the most and does the most for the state should also receive the highest rewards. And I think, said he, that even to the worst it will seem proper that the good should have the larger share.

Now Cyrus wished for the sake of the peers themselves that this measure should pass; for he thought that even they themselves would be better, if they knew that they also should be judged by their works and should receive according to their deserts. And so it seemed to him to be the proper time to bring this matter to a vote now, while the peers also were questioning the commoners’ claims to equality. Accordingly, those in the tenth agreed to submit the question to a discussion and they said that whoever thought himself to be a man ought to advocate it.

But one of the captains said with a laugh: Well, I know a man of the commoners, too, who will support the proposition not to have share and share alike in that indiscriminate fashion.Another asked him whom he meant; and he answered: By Zeus, he is a messmate of ours, who in everything does his best to get the largest share.What! the largest share of hard work, too? asked another. No, by Zeus, said he; not by any means; but here I have been caught in a falsehood. For my observation is that he very good-naturedly consents to have a smaller share of hard work and other things of that sort than anybody else.

Well, men, said Cyrus, I am convinced that[*](The vicious and lazy have no place in an army) such fellows as this one of whom our friend has just been telling us must be weeded out of the ranks, if we are to keep our army industrious and obedient. For it seems to me that the majority of the soldiers are the sort to follow wherever any one leads; and the good and noble, I think, try to lead only to what is good and noble, and the vicious to what is vicious.

And therefore the base oftentimes find a larger following of congenial spirits than the noble. For since vice makes her appeal through the pleasures of the moment, she has their assistance to persuade many to accept her views; but virtue, leading up hill, is not at all clever at attracting men at first sight and without reflection; and especially is this true, when there are others who call in the opposite direction, to what is downhill and easy.

And so, when people are bad only because of laziness and indolence, I believe that they, like drones, damage their associates only by the cost of their keeping. But those who are poor companions in toil, and also extravagant and shameless in their desire for any advantage, these are likely also to lead others to what is vicious; for they are often able to demonstrate that vice does gain some advantage. And so we must weed out such men at any cost.

Do not, however, endeavour to fill up their[*](How to fill vacant places in the ranks) places in the ranks with your own countrymen only; but, just as in selecting a team you seek out not horses that are home-bred but those which are best, so also in the case of men, take them from all sources—whoever you think will be most likely to contribute to your strength and to your honour. And I have the following illustrations to prove the worth of my suggestion: a chariot would never go fast, I am sure, if slow horses were attached to it, nor would it be serviceable if horses unfit for service were harnessed to it; nor yet could a house be well managed if it employed vicious servants, but it would suffer less from having no servants at all than from being kept in confusion by incapable servants.

Let me assure you of this, too, my friends, he added, that the weeding out of the vicious will bring not only this advantage, that the vicious will be out of the way, but also among those who remain the ones that have already been infected with vice will be purged of it, while the virtuous seeing the vicious disgraced will cleave more eagerly to virtue.

With that he concluded; and all his friends agreed that what he said was true, and they began to act upon that principle. After that Cyrus began again to jest with them;[*](The ugly favourite.) for he had observed that one of the lieutenants had brought along as a guest and companion at table an exceedingly hairy and exceedingly ill-favoured man; and addressing the lieutenant by name he spoke as follows: Well, Sambaulas, said he, so you also have adopted the Greek fashion, have you, and take about with you everywhere this youngster who is now beside you, because he is so handsome?Yes, by Zeus, said Sambaulas; at all events I enjoy both his company and his looks.

When his messmates heard this, they looked at the man; and when they saw that his countenance was exceedingly ugly, they all laughed. And one of them said: In the name of the gods, Sambaulas, what has this fellow done to make such a hit with you?

By Zeus, fellows, he answered, I will tell you. Every time that I have called him, whether by day or by night, he has never made any excuse saying that he had not time, nor has he answered my call slowly, but always on a run. And as often as I have bidden him do anything, I have never seen him perform it without sweat; and besides, by showing them not by precept but by example what sort of men they ought to be, he has made his whole squad of ten just like himself.

And yet, said one of the men, although he is such an excellent fellow, you don’t kiss him as you do your relatives?And the homely man answered this and said: No, by Zeus, for he is not fond of hard work; for if he wished to kiss me, that would be an ample substitute for all his drill-work.