Cyropaedia

Xenophon

Xenophon, creator; Xenophon in Seven Volumes Vol 5-6; Miller, Walter, 1864-1949, editor, translator

The rest, of course, laughed over the military escort of the letter, and Cyrus said: O Zeus and all the gods! What sort of men we have then as our comrades; they are so easily won by kindness that we can make many of them our firm friends with even a little piece of meat; and they are so obedient that they obey even before the orders are given. I, for my part, do not know what sort of soldiers one could ask to have in preference to these!

Thus Cyrus praised his soldiers, laughing at[*](Objections raised to both stories) the same time. But one of his captains, Aglaïtadas by name, one of the most austere of men, happened to be in Cyrus’s tent at the same time and he spoke somewhat as follows: You don’t mean to say, Cyrus, that you think what these fellows have been telling is true? Well said Cyrus, what object could they have, pray, in telling a lie? What object, indeed, said the other, except that they wanted to raise a laugh; and so they tell these stories and try to humbug us.

Hush said Cyrus. don’t call these men humbugs. For to me, the name humbug seems to apply to those who pretend that they are richer than they are or braver than they are, and to those who promise to do what they cannot do, and that, too, when it is evident that they do this only for the sake of getting something or making some gain. But those who invent stories to amuse their companions and not for their own gain nor at the expense of their hearers nor to the injury of any one, why should these men not be called witty and entertaining rather than humbugs?

Thus Cyrus defended those who had furnished[*](Is it better to make men laugh than weep?) the fun, and the captain himself who had told the anecdote about his platoon said: Verily, Aglaïtadas, you might find serious fault with us, if we tried to make you weep, like some authors who invent touching incidents in their poems and stories and try to move us to tears; but now, although you yourself know that we wish to entertain you and not to do you any harm at all, still you heap such reproaches upon us.

Aye, by Zeus, said Aglaïtadas, and justly, too, since he that makes his friends laugh seems to me to do them much less service than he who makes them weep; and if you will look at it rightly, you, too, will find that I speak the truth. At any rate, fathers develop self-control in their sons by making them weep, and teachers impress good lessons upon their pupils in the same way, and the laws, too, turn the citizens to justice by making them weep. But could you say that those who make us laugh either do good to our bodies or make our minds any more fitted for the management of our private business or of the affairs of state?

Hereupon Hystaspas answered somewhat as follows: If you will heed me, Aglaïtadas, you will freely expend this very valuable commodity upon your enemies and will try to set them to weeping; but upon us and your friends here you will please to lavish this cheap article, laughter. And you can, for I know you must have a great quantity of it stored up; for you have never spent it upon yourself nor do you ever afford any laughter for your friends or for your enemies if you can help it. So you have no excuse for begrudging us a laugh.What said Aglaïtadas; do you really think, Hystaspas, to get a laugh out of me?Well, by Zeus, said the other captain, he is a very foolish fellow, let me tell you, if he does; for I believe one might rub fire out of you more easily than provoke a laugh from you.

At this, of course, the rest laughed; for they knew his character, and Aglaïtadas himself smiled at the sally. And Cyrus seeing him brighten up said: It is not right, captain, for you to corrupt our most serious man by persuading him to laugh, and that, too, said he, when he is such a foe to laughter.

With that, the subject was dropt. But at this point Chrysantas spoke as follows.

Cyrus, said he, and all you here present, I observe, for my part, that some have come out with us who are of superior merit, others who are less deserving than we. Now, if we meet with success, these will all expect to have share and share alike. And yet I[*](The proper basis for distributing prize money) do not believe that anything in the world is more unfair than for the bad and good to be awarded equal shares. Well, then, in the name of the gods, my men, Cyrus replied to this, will it not be a very good thing for us to suggest to the army a debate on this question: shall we, in case God gives us any success to reward our toils, give to all an equal share or shall we take into consideration each man’s services and bestow increased rewards upon him commensurate with them?

And what is the use, said Chrysantas, of starting a discussion concerning this matter? Why not rather announce that you propose to do thus and so? Pray, did you not announce the games and offer the prizes that way? Yes, by Zeus, said Cyrus; but this is not a parallel case. For what the men obtain by fighting, that, I suppose, they will consider their own common property; but the command of the army they still consider fairly to be mine, so that when I appoint the judges, I am sure they think I am within my rights.

And do you really believe, said Chrysantas, that the mass meeting would adopt a resolution that each one should not have an equal share, but that the best should have the preference both in honours and gifts? Yes said Cyrus, I do, partly because we recommend[*](Rewards according to merit) it, and partly because it is mean to oppose a proposition that the one who suffers the most and does the most for the state should also receive the highest rewards. And I think, said he, that even to the worst it will seem proper that the good should have the larger share.