Res Gestae

After long lasting and serious dispersion from[*](368 ff. A.D.) affairs in Rome, constrained by the great mass of foreign events, I shall return to a brief account of these, beginning with the prefecture of Olybrius,[*](368—370.) which was exceedingly peaceful and mild; for he never allowed himself to be turned from humane conduct, but was careful and anxious that no word or act of his should ever be found harsh. He severely punished calumny, cut down the profits of the privy-purse wherever it was possible, fully and impartially distinguished justice from injustice, and showed himself most lenient towards those wbom he

But a cloud was thrown over all these merits by a fault which indeed was not harmful to the community, but yet was a stain on a high official; for almost his whole private life, since he was inclined to luxury, he spent in playhouses and love affairs, though the latter were neither unlawful nor incestuous.

After him Ampelius[*](371–372.) governed the city, a man who himself also lusted after pleasures. Born at Antioch, he had been formerly marshal of the court, was twice raised to the rank of proconsul,[*](In Achaia and in Africa.) and then, long afterwards, to the high honour of the prefecture. Although admirable in other respects and well suited to gaining the favour of the people, he was nevertheless sometimes hard, and I wish he had been steadfast of purpose; for he could have corrected in part, even though to a small extent, the incitements of appetite and gross gluttony, if he had not let himself be turned to laxity and thus lost enduring fame.

For he gave orders that no wine-shop should be opened before the fourth hour,[*](About nine o’clock in the morning.) that no one of the common people should heat water,[*](For mixing with wine.) that up to a fixed hour of the day no victualler should offer cooked meat for sale,[*](Such laws were passed first by Tiberius; cf. Suet., Tib. 34. They were renewed by Claudius (Dio, lx. 6, 7) and Nero (Suet., Nero, 16, 2).) and that no respectable man should be seen chewing anything in public.

These shameful acts, and others worse than these, had, by being constantly overlooked, blazed up to such unbridled heights that not even that celebrated Cretan Epimenides,[*](He lived in the sixth century B.C., and according to the myth, lived in a cave for a time variously given as 40, 50 or 78 years. Later, called to the help of the Athenians when they were in trouble, he carried out many reforms. He actually came to Athens in 596 B.C., to purify the city from the pestilence caused by the crimes of Cylon, a generation before.) if,

And first, as often, according to the quantity of topics,[*](Or possibly, so far as space allowed. ) I shall give an account of the delinquencies of the nobles and then of the common people, condensing the events in a rapid disgression.

Some men, distinguished (as they think) by famous fore-names, pride themselves beyond measure in being called Reburri, Flavonii, Pagonii, Gereones, and Dalii, along with Tarracii and Pherrasii, and many other equally fine-sounding indications of eminent ancestry.

Others, resplendent in silken garments, as though they were to be led to death,[*](Cf. xvi. 5, 5, where Lind. cites reflabilis tori plumeo sepulcro superba from Zeno Veronensis, Orat. de Spiritu et Corp., p. 367.) or as if (to speak without any evil omen) they were bringing up the rear[*](As commanders of the army; see xxv. 1, 5.) preceded by an army, are followed by a throng of slaves drawn up in troops, amid noise and confusion.

When such men, each attended by fifty servants, have entered the vaulted rooms of a bath, they shout in threatening tones: Where on earth are our attendants? If they have learned that an unknown courtesan has suddenly appeared, some woman who has been a common prostitute of the crowd of our city, some old strumpet, they all strive to be the first to reach her, and caressing the new-comer, extol her with such disgraceful flattery as the Parthians do Samiramis, the Egyptians their Cleopatras, the Carians Artemisia, or the people of

Some of these men, when one begins to salute them breast to breast, like menacing bulls turn to one side their heads, where they should be kissed, and offer their flatterers their knees to kiss or their hands, thinking that quite enough to ensure them a happy life; and they believe that a stranger is given an abundance of all the duties of courtesy, even though the great men may perhaps be under obligation to him, if he is asked what hot baths or waters he uses, or at what house he has been put up.

And although they are so important and, in their own opinion, such cultivators of the virtues, if they learn that someone has announced that horses or chariots are coming from anywhere whatever, they hover over this same man and ask him questions as anxiously as their ancestors looked up to the two sons of Tyndareus,[*](Castor and Pollux, who were present at the battle at Lake Regillus, 496 B.C., and brought news of victory to Rome; cf. Florus, i. 5, 4; Val. Max. i. 8, 1–2. They are said also to have announced the victories over Perseus at Pydna (Flor. i. 28, 15) and over the Cimbri (i. 38, 20).) when they filled everything with joy by announcing those famous victories of olden days.

Their houses are frequented by idle chatterboxes, who with various pretences of approval applaud every word of the man of loftier fortune, emulating the witty flatteries of the parasites in the comedies. For just as the parasites puff up boastful

Sometimes at their banquets the scales are even called for, in order to weigh the fish, birds, and dormice[*](These were considered a delicacy; cf. Apicius, viii. 9; cf. Pliny, N.H. viii. 223.) that are served, whose great size they commend again and again, as hitherto unexampled, often repeating it to the weariness of those present, especially when thirty secretaries stand near by, with pen-cases and small tablets, recording these same items, so that the only thing lacking seems to be a schoolmaster.[*](The meaning is not clear. Perhaps it is that only a schoolmaster is lacking to make the place look like a school; or to praise the host in eloquent language. The former seems more probable; the secretaries (and the guests?) would be the pupils.)

Some of them hate learning as they do poison, and read with attentive care only Juvenal and Marius Maximus,[*](City prefect under Macrinus (Dio, lxxix. 14, 3) who wrote biographies of the Caesars. On him see Vopiscus, Firmus, 1, 2: homo omnium verbosissimus, qui et mythistoricis se voluminibus implicavit. The association of Juvenal with this writer is a strange one, if the poet is meant.) in their boundless idleness handling no other books than these, for what reason it is not for my humble mind to judge.[*](Cf. xxvii. 11, 1.)

Whereas, considering the greatness of their fame and of their parentage, they ought to pore over many and varied works; they ought to learn that Socrates,[*](Cf. Val. Max. viii. 7, Ext. 8; Cic., De Senec. 8, 26; Socrates’ reply is in the words of Solon, about whom a somewhat similar story is told (ἵνα μαθὼν αὐτὸ ἀποθάνω), and perhaps Ammianus confused the two, as Valesius thought.) when condemned to death and thrown into prison, asked a musician, who was skilfully rendering a song

But a few among them are so strict in punishing offences, that if a slave is slow in bringing the hot water, they condemn him to suffer three hundred lashes; if he has intentionally killed a man, although many people insist that he be condemned to death, his master will merely cry out: What should a worthless fellow do, notorious for wicked deeds? But if he dares to do anything else like that hereafter, he shall be punished.

But the height of refinement with these men at present is, that it is better for a stranger to kill any man’s brother than to decline his invitation to dinner. For a senator thinks that he is suffering the loss of a rich property, if the man whom he has, after considerable weighing of pros and cons, invited once, fails to appear at his table.

Some of them, if they make a longish journey to visit their estates, or to hunt by the labours of others,[*](I.e., their slaves do the hunting; cf. Pliny, N.H. xxix. 19; Pliny the Younger, Epist. i. 6.) think that they have equalled the marches of Alexander the Great or of Caesar; or if they have sailed in their gaily-painted boats from the Lake of Avernus to Puteoli, it is the

Then when they come from the bath of Silvanus or from the healing waters of Mamaea,[*](No such places are known in Rome. There was a pool of Mamaea at Baiae; see Lamprid., Alex. Sev. 26, 10, et in Baiano palatium cum stagno, quod Mamaeae nomine hodieque censetur (officially listed); hence the Silvani lavacrum also was probably in Campania.) as any one of them emerges he has himself dried with the finest linens, opens the presses and carefully searches amongst garments shimmering with shifting light, of which he brings enough with him to clothe eleven men. At length, some are chosen and he puts them on; then he takes back his rings, which, in order that the dampness may not injure them, he has handed to a servant, and after his fingers have been as good as measured to receive them, he departs.

And, indeed, if any veteran has recently retired because of his years from service with the emperor, such a company of admirers attend him that . . . is considered to be the leader of the old song; the others quietly listen to what he says. He alone, like the father of a family, tells irrelevant