Noctes Atticae

On the punishment by the censors of men who had made untimely jokes in their hearing; also a deliberation as to the punishment of a man who had happened to yawn when standing before them.

AMONG the severities of the censors these three examples of the extreme strictness of their discipline are recorded in literature. The first is of this sort: The censor was administering the usual oath regarding wives, which was worded as follows:

Have you, to the best of your knowledge and belief, a wife?

The man who was to take the oath was a jester, a sarcastic dog, [*](Canicula is used of a biting woman by Plaut. Cure. 598, and of Diogenes by Tertullian, adv. Marc. 1. 1.) and too much given to buffoonery. Thinking that he had a chance to crack a joke, when the censor asked him, as was customary,

Have you, to the best of your knowledge and belief, a wife?

he replied:

I indeed have a wife,

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but not, by Heaven! such a one as I could desire.

[*](The joke, which seems untranslatable, is of course on the doublemeaning of ex sententia, according to your opinion and according to your wish.) Then the censor reduced him to a commoner for his untimely quip, [*](Made him one of the aerarii; see note 1, p. 352.) and added that the reason for his action was a scurrilous joke made in his presence.

Here is another instance of the sternness of the same officials. The censors deliberated about the punishment of a man who had been brought before them by a friend as his advocate, and who had yawned in court very clearly and loudly. He was on the point of being condemned for his lapse, on the ground that it was an indication of a wandering and trifling mind and of wanton and undisguised indifference. But when the man had sworn that the yawn had overcome him much against his will and in spite of his resistance, and that he was afflicted with the disorder known as oscedo, or a tendency to yawning, he was excused from the penalty which had already been determined upon. Publius Scipio Africanus, son of Paulus, included both these stories in a speech which he made when censor, urging the people to follow the customs of their forefathers. [*](O. R. F.,2 p. 179.)

Sabinus Masurius too in the seventh book of his Memoirs relates a third instance of severity. He says:

When the censors Publius Scipio Nasica and Marcus Popilius were holding a review of the knights, they saw a horse that was very thin and ill-kept, while its rider was plump and in the best of condition. 'Why is it,' said they, 'that you are better cared for than your mount?' 'Because,' he replied, 'I take care of myself, but Statius, a worthless slave, takes care of the horse.' This answer did not seem sufficiently respectful, and the man was reduced to a commoner, according to custom.

Now Statius was a slave-name. In old times there were many slaves of that name. Caecilius too, the famous comic poet, was a slave and as such called Statius. But afterwards this was made into a kind of surname and he was called Caecilius Statius. [*](This was regular in the case of freedmen, who took the forename and gentile name of their patron, or former master, and added their slave-name as a cognomen; e.g. M. Tullius Tiro. The forename of the Caecilius to whom Statius belonged is not known.)

That the philosopher Musonius criticized and rebuked those who expressed approval of a philosopher's discourse by loud shouts and extravagant demonstrations of praise.

I have heard that the philosopher Musonius [*](p. 130, Hense.) was accustomed. . . [*](There seems to be a lacuna in the text; see crit. note.)

When a philosopher,

he says,

is uttering words of encouragement, of warning, of persuasion, or of rebuke, or is discussing any other philosophical theme, then if his hearers utter trite and commonplace expressions of praise without reflection or restraint, if they shout too, if they gesticulate, if they are stirred and swayed and impassioned by the charm of his utterance, by the rhythm of his words, and by certain musical notes, [*](Heracus suggests fritamenta in i. 11, 12.) as it were, then you may know that speaker and hearers are wasting their time, and that they are not hearing a philosopher's lecture, but a flute-player's recital. The mind,

said he,

of one who is listening to a philosopher, so long as what is said is helpful and salutary, and furnishes a cure for faults and vices, has no time or leisure for continued and extravagant applause. Whoever the hearer may be, unless he is wholly lost, during the course of the philosopher's address he must necessarily shudder and feel secret shame and

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repentance, or rejoice or wonder, and even show changes of countenance and betray varying emotions, according as the philosopher's discourse has affected him and his consciousness of the different tendencies of his mind, whether noble or base.

He added that great applause is not inconsistent with admiration, but that the greatest admiration gives rise, not to words, but to silence.

Therefore,

said he, "the wisest of all poets does not represent those who heard Ulysses' splendid account of his hardships as leaping up, when he ceased speaking, with shouts and noisy demonstrations, but he says they were one and all silent, as if amazed and confounded, since the gratification of their ears even affected their power of utterance."

1. Thus he; but they in silence all were hushed
2. And held in rapture through the shadowy hall. [*](Odyss. xiii. 1. Odysseus (Ulysses) had just finished telling his story to Alcinous, king of the Phaeacians, and his court.)