Miles Gloriosus
Plautus, Titus Maccius
Plautus. The Comedies of Plautus, Volume 1. Riley, H. T., translator. London: G. Bell and Sons, Ltd., 1912.
- I do credit you: but ’tis a thing to be wondered at, how she has been able to return from that house to ours. For, beyond a doubt, we have neither a terrace to our house, nor any garden, nor any window but what is latticed[*](But what is latticed: The clathriwere a kind of lattice or trellice-work, which, as well as network, was sometimes placed before windows to prevent serpents and other noxious reptiles from getting in.). To PHILOCOMASIUM. But, undoubtedly, I did see you in the house next door.
- Do you persist, you rascal, in pretending to accuse her?
- In good sooth, then, the dream has not turned out untrue, that I dreamed last night.
- What did you dream?
- I’ll tell you; but, I pray you, give attention. Last night, in my sleep, my twin-sister seemed to have come from Athens to Ephesus with a certain person, her lover. Both of them seemed to me to be having their lodgings here next door.
- to the AUDIENCE. The dream that’s being related is Palaestrio’s—pray, go on.
- I seemed to be delighted because my sister had come, and on her account I seemed to be incurring a most grievous suspicion. For, in my sleep, my own servant seemed to accuse me, as you are now doing, of being caressed by a strange young man, whereas it was that own twin-sister of mine, who had been toying with her own friend. Thus did I dream that I was wrongfully accused of a crime.
- And isn’t just the same thing befalling you when awake, that you speak of as seen in your sleep? Capital; i’ faith, the dream is verified: go in-doors, and pray [*](And pray: After any ill-omened dream, it was the custom to offer corn and frankincense to Jupiter Prodigialis, the disposer of prodigies, and other of the Deities, in order that evil might be averted.). I should recommend that this be told to the Captain.
- I am resolved to do so; nor, in fact, will I allow myself, with impunity, to be accused of disgraceful conduct. Goes into the CAPTAIN’S house.
- I fear for the thing I have done; my back does so tingle all over.
- Are you not aware that you are done for?
- Now, indeed, I’m sure she is at home; I am now resolved to watch our door, wheresoever she may be. Places himself at the door.
- But, prithee, Sceledrus, how very like the dream she dreamt to what has happened; and how you really did believe that you had seen her kissing. ---
- And do you suppose that I didn’t see her?
- I’ faith, I verily believe you’ll come to your senses when ’tis too late. If this matter should only reach our master, you certainly are undone.
- Now, at length, I find out that there was a mist placed before my eyes.
- I’ faith, that really has been plain for some time now; as she was here in-doors all the while.
- Not a word of certainty have I to utter; I did not see her, although I did see her.
- By my troth, through this folly of yours you certainly have nearly ruined us; while you have wished to prove yourself faithful to your master, you have been almost undone. But the door of our next neighbour makes a noise; I’ll be silent.
Enter PHILOCOMASIUM[*](Sceledrus having been duly prepared, Philocomasium appears as her twin-sister, who is supposed to have come the day before from Athens to Ephesus, and gives directions about returning thanks for having landed in safety. As the circumstance of the communication between the houses is known to the Audience, and is not suspected by Sceledrus, his embarrassment is highly diverting, and very cleverly depicted.), dressed in another habit, from the house of PERIPLECOMENUS.PHILOCOMASIUM
- to a servant SERVANT. Put fire on the altar, that in my joy I may return praises and thanks to Diana of Ephesus, and that I may send up for her a grateful smoke with odours of Arabia: she who has preserved me in the realms of Neptune and amid the boisterous temples[*](Boisterous temples: In the language of the Poets, Neptune and the inferior Sea Divinities are supposed to have their temples and abodes in the sea and rivers.), where with raging billows I have been so recently dismayed.