Miles Gloriosus

Plautus, Titus Maccius

Plautus. The Comedies of Plautus, Volume 1. Riley, H. T., translator. London: G. Bell and Sons, Ltd., 1912.

  1. I’m afraid.
PALAESTRIO
  1. What are you afraid of?
SCELEDRUS
  1. By my troth, lest, this day, as many domestics as there are of us here, we shall jump into a most woful punishmient by way of torture.
PALAESTRIO
  1. Jump you alone, please; for I don’t at all like this jumping in[*](This jumping in: Some critics think that there is some hidden meaning or allusion in the words insulturamand desulturam.That hardly seems to be the case, for Palaestrio might naturally say in return to the warning of the other, I like neither your jumping in nor our jumping out.) and jumping out.
SCELEDRUS
  1. Perhaps you don’t know what new mischance has happened at home?
PALAESTRIO
  1. What mischance is this?
SCELEDRUS
  1. A disgraceful one.
PALAESTRIO
  1. Do you then keep it to yourself alone: don’t tell it me; I don’t want to know it.
SCELEDRUS
  1. But I won’t let you not know it. To-day I was following our monkey upon the tiles, next door there. Points to the house.
PALAESTRIO
  1. By my troth, Sceledrus, a worthless fellow, you were following a worthless beast.
SCELEDRUS
  1. The Gods confound you!
PALAESTRIO
  1. That befits yourself, since you began the conversation.
SCELEDRUS
  1. By chance, as it happened, I looked down there through the skylight, into the next house; and there I saw Philocomasium toying with some strange young man, I know not whom.
PALAESTRIO
  1. What scandalous thing is this I hear of you, Sceledrus?
SCELEDRUS
  1. I’ faith, I did see her, beyond a doubt.
PALAESTRIO
  1. What, yourself?
SCELEDRUS
  1. Yes, I myself, with these eyes of mine.
PALAESTRIO
  1. Get away, it isn’t likely what you say, nor did you see her.
SCELEDRUS
  1. Do I, then, appear to you as if I were purblind?
PALAESTRIO
  1. ’Twere better for you to ask the doctor about that. But, indeed, if the Gods only love you, don’t you rashly father this[*](Rashly father this: Tollas fabulam.This metaphor is borrowed from the custom among the Romans of laying the new-born child upon the ground upon which it was taken up (tollebatur) by the father, or other person who intended to stand in the place of parent to it.) idle story. Now are you breeding thence a fatal dilemma for your legs and head; for, in two ways, the cause is contrived for you to be ruined, unless you put a check upon your foolish chattering.