Dialogi mortuorum

Hermes I dare say! A fine time I shall have of it, if I am to pay for the shades.

Charon I’m not going to let you off.

Menippus You can haul up your ship and wait, for all I care. If I have not got the money, I can’t pay you, can I?

Charon You knew you ought to bring it?

Menippus I knew that: but I hadn’t got it. What would you have? I ought not to have died, I suppose?

Charon So you are to have the distinction of being the only passenger that ever crossed gratis?

Menippus Oh, come now: gratis! I took an oar, and I baled; and I didn’t cry, which is more than can be said for any of the others.

Charon That’s neither here nor there. I must have my penny; it’s only right.

Menippus Well, you had better take me back again to life.

Charon Yes, and get a thrashing from Aeacus for my pains! I like that.

Menippus Well, don’t bother me.

Charon Let me see what you have got in that wallet.

Menippus Beans: have some?—and a Hecate’s supper.

Charon Where did you pick up this Cynic, Hermes? The noise he made on the crossing, too! laughing and jeering at all the rest, and singing, when every one else was at his lamentations.

Hermes Ah, Charon, you little know your passenger! Independence, every inch of him: he cares for noone. 'Tis Menippus.

Charon Wait till I catch you——

Menippus Precisely; I'll wait—till you catch me again.

Protesilaus Lord, King, our Zeus! and thou, daughter of Demeter! grant a lover’s boon!

Pluto What do you want? who are you?

Protesilaus Protesilaus, son of Iphiclus, of Phylace, one of the Achaean host, the first that died at Troy. And the boon I ask is release and one day’s life.

Pluto Ah, friend, that is the love that all these dead men love, and none shall ever win.

Protesilaus Nay, dread lord, ’tis not life I love, but the bride that I left new wedded in my chamber that day I sailed away—ah me, to be slain by Hector as my foot touched land! My lord, that yearning gives me no peace. I return content, if she might look on me but for an hour.

Pluto Did you miss your dose of Lethe, man?

Protesilaus Nay, lord; but this prevailed against it.

Pluto Oh, well, wait a little; she will come to you dne day; it is so simple; no need for you to be going up.

Protesilaus My heart is sick with hope deferred; thou too, O Pluto, hast loved; thou knowest what love is.

Pluto What good will it do you to come to life for a day, and then renew your pains?

Protesilaus I think to win her to come with me, and bring two dead for one.

Pluto It may not be; it never has been.