Heraclitus the EphesianThe weeping philosopher, as Democritus was the laughing philosopher; cf. Juvenal, x. 33 ff. He flourished about 535-475 B.C. also agrees with this, when he reminds us that the weak and cowardly have sometimes, through the mutability of fortune, been victorious over eminent men; but that the most conspicuous praise is won, when high-placed power sending, as it were, under the yoke the inclination to harm, to be angry, and to show cruelty, on the citadel of a spirit victorious over itself has raised a glorious trophy.

Now, although this emperor in foreign wars met with loss and disaster, yet he was elated by his success in civil conflicts and drenched with awful gore from the internal wounds of the state. It was on this unworthy rather than just or usual groundIt was usual to celebrate a triumph only over foreign enemies, and the same rule applied to triumphal arches. that in Gaul and Pannonia he erected triumphal archesAlthough this term is so common in English, this is the first and only occurrence in Latin literature, and it is found besides only in four late inscriptions from northern Africa. at great expense commemorating the ruin of the provinces,That is, his victories over his rivals, and the bloodshed and ruin attending them. and added records of his deeds, that men might read of him so long as those monuments could last.

He was to an excessive degree under the influence of his wives, and the shrill-voiced eunuchs, and certain of the court officials, who applauded his every word, and listened for his yes or no, in order to be able to agree with him.

The bitterness of the times was increased by the insatiate extortion of the tax-collectors, who brought him more hatred than money; and to many this seemed the more intolerable, for the reason that he never investigated a dispute, nor had regard for the welfare of the provinces, although they were oppressed by a multiplicity of taxes and tributes. And besides this, he found it easy to take away exemptions which he had once given.

The plainCf. absolutio, xiv. 10, 13; responsum absolutum, xxx. 1, 4; planis absolutisque decretis, xxii. 5, 2. and simple religion of the Christians he obscured by a dotard’s superstition, and by subtle and involved discussions about dogma, rather than by seriously trying to make them agree, he aroused many controversies; and as these spread more and more, he fed them with contentious words. And since throngs of bishops hastened hither and thither on the public post-horses to the various synods, as they call them, while he sought to make the whole ritual conform to his own will, he cut the sinews of the courier-service.

His bodily appearance and form were as follows: he was rather dark, with bulging eyes and sharp-sighted; his hair was soft and his regularly shaven cheeks were neat and shining; from the meeting of neck and shoulders to the groin he was unusually long, and his legs were very short and bowed, for which reason he was good at running and leaping.

When the corpse of the deceased emperor had been washed and placed in a coffin, Jovianus, who was at that time still an officer in the bodyguard, was ordered to escort it with regal pomp to Constantinople, to be interred beside his kinsfolk.

And as he sat in the carriage that bore the remains, samples of the soldiers’ rations (probae, as they themselves call them) were presented to him, as they commonly are to emperors,The emperors took pains to see that the soldiers were well fed. Cf. Spartianus, 11, 1; Lampridius, xv. 5. and the public courier-horses were shown to him, and the people thronged about him in the customary manner. These and similar things foretold imperial power for the said Jovianus, but of an empty and shadowy kind, since he was merely the director of a funeral procession.