Men interested in athletics and in the care of their bodies think not only of condition and exercise but: also of relaxation in season; in fact, they consider this the principal part of training. In like manner students, I think, after much reading of serious works may profitably relax their minds and put them in better trim for future labour.
It
would be appropriate recreation for them if they
were to take up the sort of reading that, instead of
affording just pure amusement based on wit and
humour, also boasts a little food for thought that the
Muses would not altogether spurn; and I think
they will consider the present work something
of the kind. They will find it enticing not only
for the novelty of its subject, for the humour of its
plan and because I tell all kinds of lies in a plausible
and specious way, but also because everything in my
story is a more or less comical parody of one or
One of them is Ctesias, son of
Ctesiochus, of Cnidos, who wrote a great deal about
India and its characteristics that he had never seen
himself nor heard from anyone else with a reputation
for truthfulness. Iambulus also wrote much that
was strange about the countries in the great sea: he
made up a falsehood that is patent to everybody, but
wrote a story that is not uninteresting for all that.
Well, on reading all these authors, I did
not find much fault with them for their lying, as I
saw that this was already a common practice even
among men who profess philosophy.
Once upon a time, setting out from the Pillars of Hercules and heading for the western ocean with a fair wind, I went a-voyaging. The motive and purpose of my journey lay in my intellectual activity and desire for adventure, and in my wish to find out what the end of the ocean was, and who the people were that lived on the other side. On this account I put aboard a good store of provisions, stowed water enough, enlisted in the venture fifty of my acquaintances who were like-minded with myself, got together also a great quantity of arms, shipped the best sailing-master to be had at a big inducement, and put my boat—she was a pinnace—in trim for a long and difficult voyage.
Well, for a day and
a night we sailed before the wind without making
very much offing, as land was still dimly in sight ; but
at sunrise on the second day the wind freshened, the -
Putting in and going ashore, we lay on the ground for some time in consequence of our long misery, but finally we arose and told off thirty of our number to stay and guard the ship and twenty to go inland with me and look over the island.
When we had gone
forward through the wood about three furlongs from
the sea, we saw a slab of bronze, inscribed with
Greek letters, faint and obliterated, which said : “To
this point came Hercules and Dionysus.” There
were also two footprints in the rock close by, one of
which was a hundred feet long, the other less—to
my thinking, the smaller one was left by Dionysus,
the other by Hercules.
Next, after crossing the river at a place where
it was fordable, we found something wonderful in
grapevines. The part which came out of the ground,
the trunk itself, was stout and well-grown, but the
upper part was in each case a woman, entirely perfect from the waist up. They were like our pictures
of Daphne turning into a tree when Apollo is just
catching her. Out of their finger-tips grew the
branches, and they were full of grapes. Actually,
the hair of their heads was tendrils and leaves and
clusters! When we came up, they welcomed and
greeted us, some of them speaking Lydian, some
Indian, but the most part Greek. They even kissed
us on the lips, and everyone that was kissed at once
became reeling drunk. They did not suffer us, however, to gather any of the fruit, but cried out in pain
when it was plucked. Some of them actually wanted
us to embrace them, and two of my comrades complied, but could not get away again. They were
‘held fast by the part which had touched them, for it
Leaving them in the lurch, we made off to the boat, and on getting there, told the men we had left behind about everything, including the affair of our comrades with the vines. Then, taking jars, we furnished ourselves not only with water but with wine from. the river, encamped for the night on the beach close by, and at daybreak put to sea with a moderate breeze.
About noon, when the island was no longer in sight, a whirlwind suddenly arose, spun the boat about, raised her into the air about three hundred furlongs and did not let her down into the sea again ; but while she was hung up aloft a wind struck her sails and drove her ahead with bellying canvas.
For seven days and seven nights we sailed the air, and on the eighth day we saw a great country in it, resembling an island, bright and round and shining with a great light. Running in there and anchoring, we went ashore, and on investigating found that the land was inhabited and cultivated. By day nothing was in sight from the place, but as night came on we began to see many other islands hard by, some larger, some smaller, and they were like fire in colour. We also saw another country below, with cities in it and rivers and seas and forests and mountains, This we inferred to be our own world.
We determined to go still further inland, but
we met what they call the Vulture Dragoons,
and were arrested. These are men riding on large
“And if I succeed,” said he,
“in the war which I am now making on the people
of the sun, you shall lead the happiest of lives with
me.” We asked whothe enemy were, and what the
quarrel was about. “Phaethon,’ said he, “the king
of the inhabitants of the sun—for it is inhabited,
That night we stopped there as his guests, but
at daybreak we arose and took our posts, for the
scouts signalled that the enemy was near. The
number of our army was a hundred thousand, apart
from the porters, the engineers, the infantry and the
foreign allies ; of this total, eighty thousand were
Vulture Dragoons and twenty thousand Grassplumeriders, The Grassplume is also a very large bird, which
instead-of plumage is all shaggy with grass and has
wings very like lettuce-leaves. Next to these the
Millet-shooters and the Garlic-fighters were posted.
Endymion also had allies who came from the Great
Bear—thirty thousand Flea-archers and fifty thousand
Volplaneurs. The Flea-archers ride on great fleas,
These were the forces of Endymion. They all had the same equipment—helmets of beans (their beans are large and tough); scale-corselets of lupines (they sew together the skins of lupines to make the corselets, and in that country the skin of the lupine is unbreakable, like horn); shields and swords of the Greek pattern.
When the time
came, they took position thus; on the right wing,
the Vulture Dragoons and the king, with the bravest
about him (we were among them); on the left, the
Grassplumes; in the centre, the allies, in whatever
formation they liked. The infantry came to about
sixty million, and was deployed as follows. Spiders
in that country are numerous and large, all of them
far larger than the Cyclades islands. They were
As to the enemy, on the left were the Ant
Dragoons, with whom was Phaethon. They are very
large beasts with wings, like the ants that we have,
except in size: the largest one was two hundred feet
long.
This, then, was the array with which Phaethon
came on. Joining battle when the flags had been
flown and the donkeys on both sides had brayed (for
they had donkeys for trumpeters), they fought. The -
left wing of the Sunites fled at. once, without even
receiving the charge of the Vulture Horse, and we
pursued, cutting them down. But their right wing got
the better of the left on our side, and the Sky-mosquitoes advanced in pursuit right up to the infantry.
Then, when the infantry came to the rescue, they
broke and fled, especially as they saw that the forces
on their left had been defeated. It was a glorious
victory, in which many were taken alive and many
were slain; so much blood flowed on the clouds that
they were dyed and looked red, as they do in our
country when the sun is setting, and so much also
dripped down on the earth that I wonder whether
something of the sort did not take place in the sky
long ago, when Homer supposed that Zeus had sent
a rain of blood on account of the death of Sarpedon.1
When we had returned from.the pursuit we set up
two trophies, one on the spider-webs for the infantry
battle and the other, for the sky battle, on the clouds.
The enemy decided not to lay siege
to the city, but on their way back they built a
wall through the air, so that the rays of the sun
should no longer reach the moon. The wall was
double, made of cloud, so that a genuine eclipse of the
moon took place, and she was completely enshrouded
On the following conditions the Sunites and their allies make peace with the Moonites and Heir allies, to wit: That the Sunites tear down the dividing- wall and do not invade the moon again, and that they make over the prisoners of war, each at a set ransom ;
That the Moonites permit the stars tu be autonomous, and do not make war on the Sunites ;
That each country aid the other if it be attacked ;
That in yearly tribute the King of the Moonites pay the King of the Sunites ten thousand gallons of dew, and that he give ten thousand of his people as hostages ;
That the colony on the Morning Star be planted in common, and that anyone else who so desires may take part in it;
That the treaty be inseribed on a slab of electrum and set up in mid-air, on the common confines. Attested under hand and seal.
(For the Sunites)
Firebrace
Parcher
Burns
(For the Moonites)
Darkling
Moony
Allbright
On those terms peace was made, and then the wall was torn down at once and we prisoners were restored. When we reached the moon we were met and tearfully welcomed by our comrades and by Endymion himself. He wanted me to stay with him and join the colony, promising to give me his own son in marriage—there are no women in their country. But I was not to be persuaded ; I asked him to let me go down to the sea. When he perceived that he could not prevail on me, he let us go after entertaining us for seven days.
In the interval, while I was living on the moon,
I observed some strange and wonderful things
that I wish to speak of. In the first place there is
the fact that they are not born of women but of
men: they marry men and do not even know the
word woman at all! Up to the age of twenty-five
each is a wife, and thereafter a husband: They
carry their children in the calf of the leg instead of
the belly. When conception takes place the calf
begins to swell. In course of time they cut it open
and deliver the child dead, and then they bring it
to life by putting it in the wind with its mouth
open. It seems to me that the term “belly of the
leg"
When a man grows old, he does
not die, but is dissolved like smoke and turns into
air. They all eat the same food; they light a fire
and cook frogs on the coals—they have quantities of
frogs, that fly about in the air—and while they are
cooking, they sit about them as if at table, snuff up
the rising smoke and gorge themselves.
A man is thought beautiful in that country if
he is bald and hairless, and they quite detest long-haired people. It is different on the comets, where
they think long-haired people beautiful—there were
visitors in the moon who told us about them.
Their noses run honey of great pungency, and when they work or take exercise, they sweat milk all over , their bodies, of such quality that cheese can actually be made from it by dripping in a little of the honey. They make oil from onions, and it is very clear and sweet-smelling, like myrrh. They have many watervines, the grapes. of which are like hailstones, and to my thinking, the hail that falls down on.us is due to the bursting. of the bunches when a wind strikes and shakes, those vines. They use their bellies for pockets, putting into them anything they have use for,as they can open and shut them. These parts do not seem to have any intestines in them or anything else, except that they are all shaggy and hairy inside, so that the children enter them when it is cold.
The clothing of the rich is malleable glass
A large looking-glass is fixed above a well, which is not very deep. If a man goes down into the well, he hears everything that is said among us on earth, and if he looks into the looking-glass he sees every city and every country just as if he were standing over it. When I tried it I saw my family and my whole native land, but I cannot go further and say for certain whether they also saw me. Anyone who does not believe ‘this is so will find, if ever he gets there himself, that I am telling the truth.
To go back to my story, we embraced the king and his friends, went aboard, and put off. Endymion even gave me presents—two of the glass tunics, five of bronze, and a suit of lupine armour—but I left them all behind in the whale. He also sent a thousand Vulture Dragoons with us to escort us for sixty miles.
On our way ‘we passed many countries and put
in at the Morning Star, which was just being
colonised. We landed there and procured water.
Going aboard and making for the zodiac, we passed
the sun to port, hugging the shore. We did not
land, though many of my comrades wanted to; for
the wind was unfavourable. But we saw that the
country was green and fertile and well-watered, and
full of untold good things. On seeing us, the Cloudcentaurs, who had entered the service of Phaethon,
The Vulture Dragoons had already left us. Sailing the next night and day we reached Lamptown toward evening, already being on our downward way. This city lies in the air midway between the Pleiades and the Hyades, though much lower than the Zodiac. On landing, we did not find any men at all, but a lot of lamps running about and loitering in the public square and at the harbour. Some of them were small and poor, so to speak; a few, being great and powerful, were very splendid and conspicuous. Each of them has his own house, or sconce, they have names like men, and we heard - them talking. They offered us no harm, but invited us to be their guests. We were afraid, however, and none of us ventured to eat a mouthful or close an eye. They have a public building in the centre of the city, where their magistrate sits all night and " ealls each of them by name, and whoever does not answer is sentenced to death for deserting. They are executed by being put out. We were at court, saw what went on, and heard the lamps defend themselves and tell why they came late. There I recognised our own lamp: I spoke to hm and enquired how things were at home, and he told me all about them.
That night we stopped there, but on the next day
we set sail and continued our voyage. By this time
When we touched the water we were marvellously pleased and happy, made as merry as.we could in every way, and went over the side for a swim, for by good luck it was calm and the sea was smooth.
It would seem, however, that a change for the
better often proves a prelude to greater ills. We
had sailed just two days in fair weather and the third
day was breaking when toward sunrise we suddenly
saw a number of sea-monsters, whales. One among
them, the largest of all, was fully one hundred and
fifty miles long. He came at us with open mouth,
dashing up the sea far in advance, foam-washed,
showing teeth much larger than the emblems of
Dionysus in our country,
When we were inside, it
was dark at first, and we could not see anything,
but afterwards, when he opened his mouth, we saw
a great cavity, flat all over and high, and large
enough for the housing of a great city. In it
there were fish, large and small, and many other
creatures all mangled, ships’ rigging and anchors,
human bones, and merchandise. In the middle
there was land with hills on it, which to my thinking
was formed of the mud that he had swallowed.
Indeed, a forest of all kinds of trees had grown on
it, garden stuff had come up, and_ everything
appeared to be under cultivation. The coast of the
island was twenty-seven miles long. Sea-birds were
to be seen nesting on the trees, gulls and kingfishers.
At first we shed tears for a long time, and then
I roused my comrades and we provided for the ship
by shoring it up and for ourselves by rubbing sticks
together, lighting a fire and getting dinner as best
we could. We had at hand plenty of fish’ of all
kinds, and we still had the water from the Morning
Star. On rising the next day, whenever the whale
opened his mouth we saw mountains one moment,
nothing but sky the next, and islands frequently,
and we perceived by this that he was rushing swiftly
to all parts of the sea. When at Jength we became
Advancing eagerly, we came upon an old man
and a boy very busily at work in a garden which
they were irrigating with water from the spring.
Joyful and fearful at the same instant, we stopped
still, and they too, probably feeling the same as
we, stood there without a word. In course of time
the old man said: “Who are you, strangers? Are
you sea-gods, or only unlucky men like us? As for
ourselves, though we are men and were bred on land,
we have become sea-creatures and swim about with
this beast which encompasses us, not even knowing for certain what our condition is—we suppose
that we are dead, but trust that we are alive.”
To this I replied: “We too are men, my good
sir—newcomers, who were swallowed up yesterday,
ship and all: and we set out just now with the
notion of finding out how things were in the forest,
for it appeared to be very large and thick. But
some divinity, it seems, brought us to see you and
to discover that we are not the only people shut up
in this animal. Do tell us your adventures—who
you are and how you got in here.” But he said he
would neither tell us nor question us before giving.
us what entertainment he could command, and he
He expressed huge wonder, and then told us his
own story, saying: “By birth, strangers, I am a
Cypriote. Setting out from my native land on a
trading venture with my boy whom you see and with
many servants besides, I began a voyage to Italy,
bringing various wares on a great ship, which you
no doubt saw wrecked in the mouth of the whale.
As far as Sicily we had a fortunate voyage, but
there we were caught by a violent wind and driven
out into the ocean for three days, where we fell in
with the whale, were swallowed up crew and all,
and only we two survived, the others being killed.
We buried our comrades, built a temple to Poseidon
and live this sort of life, raising vegetables and
eating fish and nuts. As you see, the forest is
extensive; and besides, it contains many grape-vines,
which yield the sweetest of wine. No doubt you
noticed the spring of beautiful cold water, too. g We
make our bed of leaves, burn all the wood we want,
snare the birds that fly in, and catch fresh fish by
going into the gills of the animal. We also bathe
there when we care to. Another thing, there is a
Everything else is
perhaps endurable, but our neighbours and fellowcountrymen are extremely quarrelsome and unpleas-_
ant, being unsociable and savage.” ‘ What!” said I,
“are there other people in the whale, too?” “Why,
yes, lots of them,” said he; “they are unfriendly
and are oddly’ built. In the western part of the
forest, the tail part, live the Broilers, an eel-eyed,
lobster-faced people that are warlike and bold, and
carnivorous. On one side, by the starboard wall,
live the Mergoats,
Such being the nature
of the country, it is for you to see how we can fight
with all these tribes and how we are to get a living.”
“How many are there of them in all?” said I.
"More than a thousand,” said he. “What sort of
weapons have they?” “Nothing but fishbones,”
This was resolved on, and we went to the boat and made ready. The cause of war was to be the withholding of the tribute, since the date for it had already arrived. They sent and demanded the tax, and he gave the messengers a contemptuous answer and drove them off. First the Solefeet and Clan Crawfish, incensed at Scintharus—for that was his name—came on with a great uproar.
Anticipating their attack, we were waiting under arms, having previously posted in our front a squad of twenty-five men in ambush, who had been dirécted to fall on the enemy when they saw that they had gone by, and this they did. Falling on them in the rear, they cut them down, while we ourselves, twenty-five in number (for Scintharus and his son were in our ranks), met them face to face and, engaging them, ran our hazard with strength and spirit. Finally we routed them and pursued them clear to their dens. The slain on the side of the enemy were one hundred and seventy ; on our side, one—the sailing-master, who was run through the midriff with a mullet-rib.
That day and night
we bivouacked on the field and made a trophy
by setting up the dry spine of a dolphin. On the
following day the others, who had heard of it,
appeared, with the Broilers, led by Tom Cod, on the
right wing, the Codheads on the left, and the
Not long afterwards they sent heralds and were for recovering their dead and conferring about an alliance, but we did not think it best to make terms with them. Indeed, on the following day we marched against them and utterly exterminated them, all but the Mergoats, and they, when they saw what was doing, ran off through the gills and threw themselves into the sea. Occupying the country, which was now clear of the enemy, we dwelt there in peace from that time on, constantly engaging in sports, hunting, tending vines and gathering the fruit of the trees. In short, we resembled men leading a life of luxury and roaming at large m a great prison that they cannot break out of.
For a year and eight months we lived in this way,
but on the fifth day of the ninth month, about the
second mouth-opening—for the whale did it once an
hour, so that we told time by the openings—about the
second opening, as I said, much shouting and commotion suddenly made itself heard, and what seemed
to be commands and oar-beats.
At first we only saw two or three, but later on
about six hundred made their appearance. Taking
sides, they went to war and had a sea-fight. Many
collided with one another bows on, and miany
The leader of one
side was Aeolocentaur, of the other, Brinedrinker.
Their battle evidently came about on account of an
act of piracy: Brinedrinker was said to have driven
off many herds of dolphins belonging to Aeolocentaur.
We knew this because we could hear them abusing
one another and calling out the names of their kings.
Finally the side of Aeolocentaur won; they sank
about a hundred and fifty of the enemy’s islands;
and took three more, crews and all; the rest backed
water and fled. After pursuing them some distance,
they turned back to the wrecks at evening, making
prizes of most of them and picking up what belonged to
themselves; for on their own side not less than eighty
islands had gone down. They also made a trophy of
the isle-fight by setting up one of the enemy’s
islands on the head of the whale. That night they
slept on shipboard around the animal, making their:
shore lines fast to him and riding at anchor just off
him ; for they had anchors, large and strong, made
of glass.
From that time on, as I could no longer endure
the life in the whale and was discontented with the
delay, I sought a way of escape. First we determined to dig through the right side and make off,
and we made a beginning and tried to cut through.
-But when we had advanced some five furlongs without getting anywhere, we left off digging and decided to set the forest afire, thinking that in this way
the whale could be killed, and in that case our escape
would be easy. So we began at the tail end and set it
afire. For seven days and seven nights he was unaffected by the burning, but on the eighth and ninth
we gathered that he was in a bad way. For instance,
he yawned less frequently, and whenever he did
yawn he closed his mouth quickly. On the tenth
and eleventh day mortification at last set in and
he was noisome. On the twelfth we perceived just .
in time that if someone did not shore his jaws open
when he yawned, so that he could not close them
again, we stood a chance of being shut up in the
dead whale and dying there ourselves. At the last
moment, then, we propped the mouth open with
great beams and made our boat ready, putting aboard
On the next day the whale was dead at last. We dragged the boat up, took her through the gaps, made her fast to the teeth and lowered her slowly into the sea. Climbing on the back and sacrificing to Poseidon there by the trophy, we camped for three days, as it was calm. On the fourth day we sailed off, and in so doing met and grounded on many of the dead from the sea-fight, and measured their bodies with amazement. For some days we sailed with a moderate breeze, and then a strong norther blew up and brought on great cold. The entire sea was frozen by it, not just on the surface but to a depth of fully six fathoms, so that we could leave the boat and run on the ice. The wind held and we could not stand it, so we devised an odd remedy—the proposer of the idea was Scintharus. We dug a very large cave in the water and stopped in it for thirty days, keeping a fire burning and eating the fish that we found in digging. When our provisions at last failed, we came out, hauled up the boat, which had frozen in, spread our canvas and slid, gliding on the ice smoothly and easily, just as if we were sailing. On the fifth day it was warm again, the ice broke up and everything turned to water once more.
After sailing about three hundred furlongs we
After stopping five days on the island we started
out on the sixth, with a bit of breeze propelling
us over a rippling sea. On the eighth day, by which
time we were no longer sailing through the milk
but in briny blue water, we came in sight of many men
running .over the sea, like us in every way, both in
shape and in size, except only their feet, which were
of cork: that is why they were called Corkfeet, if I
In a little while many islands came in sight.
Near us, to port, was Cork, where the men were
going, a city built on a great round cork. Ata
distance and more to starboard were five islands,
very large and high, from which much fire was
blazing up. Dead ahead was one that was. flat
and low-lying, not less than five hundred furlongs
off. When at length we were near it, a wonderful
breeze blew about us, sweet and fragrant, like the
one that, on the word of the historian Herodotus,
Enchanted with all this, we put in, anchored our boat and landed, leaving Scintharus and two of my comrades on board. Advancing through a flowery mead, we came upon the guards and sentinels, who bound us with rosy wreaths—the strongest fetter that they have—and led us inland to their ruler. They told us on the way that the island was the one that is called the “Isle of the Blest, and that the ruler was the Cretan Rhadamanthus. On being brought before him, we were given fourth place among the people awaiting trial.
The first case was that of Ajax,son of Telamon,
to decide whether he should be allowed to associate
with the heroes or not: he was accused of having
gone mad and killed himself. At last, when much
had been said, Rhadamanthus gave judgment that
for the present he should be given in charge of Hippocrates, the Coan physician, to take the hellebore
treatment,
The second case was a love-affair—Theseus and Menelaus at law over Helen, to
determine which of the two she should live with.
Rhadamanthus pronounced that she should live with
Menelaus, because he had undergone so much toil,
and danger on account of his marriage: then too,
The third judgment was given
in a matter of precedence between Alexander,
son of Philip, and Hannibal of Carthage, and the
decision was that Alexander outranked Hannibal,
so his chair was placed next the elder Cyrus of
Persia.
We were brought up fourth; and he asked us how it was that we trod on holy ground while still alive, and we told him the whole story. Then he had us removed, pondered for a long time, and consulted with his associates about us, Among many other associates he had Aristides the Just, of Athens. When he had come to a conclusion, sentence was given that for being inquisitive and not staying at home we should be tried after death, but that for the present we might stop a definite time in the island and share the life of the heroes, and then we must be off. They set the length of our stay at not more than seven months.
Thereupon our garlands fell away of themselves,
and we were set free and taken into the city
and to the table of the blessed. The city itself is
all of gold and the wall around it of emerald.
For clothing they use delicate purple spider-webs. As for themselves, they have no bodies, but are intangible and fleshless, with only shape and figure. Incorporeal as they are, they nevertheless live and move and think and talk. In a word, it would appear that their naked souls go about in the semblance of their bodies. Really, if one did not touch them, he could not tell that what he saw was not a body, for they are like upright shadows, only not black. Nobody grows old, but stays the same age as on coming there. Again, it is neither night among them nor yet very bright day, but the light which is on the country is. like the gray morning toward dawn, when the sun has not yet risen. Moreover, they are acquainted with only one season of the year, for it is always spring there and the only wind that blows there is Zephyr.
The country abounds in flowers and plants of all
kinds, -cultivated and otherwise.
Their table is spread outside. the city in the Elysian Fields, a very beautiful mead with thick woods of all sorts round about it, overshadowing the feasters. The couches they lie on are made of flowers, and they are attended and served by the winds, who, however, do not pour out their wine, for they do not need anyone to do this. There are great trees of the clearest glass around the table, and instead of fruit they bear cups of all shapes and sizes. When anyone comes to table he picks one or two of the cups and puts them at his place. These fill with wine at once, and that is the way they get their drink. Instead of garlands, the nightingales and the other song-birds gather flowers in their bills from the fields hard by and drop them down like snow, flying overhead and singing. Furthermore, the way they are scented is that thick clouds draw up myrrh from the springs and the river, stand over the table and under the gentle manipulation of the. winds rain down a delicate dew.
At the board they pass their time
with poetry and song. For the most part they
sing the epics of Homer, who is there himself and
shares the revelry, lying at table in the place above
Odysseus. Their choruses are of boys and gnris, fed
But the greatest thing that they have for ensuring a good time is that two springs are by the table, one of laughter and the other of enjoyment. They all drink from each of these when the revels begin, and thenceforth enjoy themselves and laugh all the while.
But I desire to mention the famous men whom
I saw there. There were all the demigods and
the veterans of Troy except Locrian Ajax, the only
one, they said, who was being punished in the
place of the wicked. Of the barbarians there were
both Cyruses, the Scythian Anacharsis, the Thracian
Zamolxis and Numa the Italian. In addition, there
were Lycurgus of Sparta, Phocion and Tellus of
Athens and the wise men, all but Periander. I
also saw Socrates, the son of Sophroniscus, chopping
logic with Nestor and Palamedes; about him were
Hyacinthus of Sparta, Narcissus of Thespiae, Hylas
and other handsome lads. It seemed to me that
Hyacinthus was his especial favourite, for at any rate
he refuted himi most. It was said that Rhadamanthus
The followers of Aristippus and
Epicurus were in the highest favour among the heroes
because they are pleasant and agreeable and jolly
good fellows, Aesop the Phrygian was also there— —
they have him for a jester. Diogenes the Cynic had so
changed his ways that he not only married Lais the
courtesan, but often got up and danced and indulged
in tomfoolery when he had had too much. None of
the Stoics was there—they were said to be still on
the way up the steep hill of virtue. With regard to
Chrysippus, we heard tell that he is not permitted
to set foot on the island until he submits himself to
the hellebore treatment for the fourth time.
They render especial honours to Achilles and after
him to Theseus. About love-making their attitude
Hardly two or three days had passed before I
went up to Homer the poet when we were both at
leisure, and questioned him about everything.
“Above all,” said I, “where do you come from?
This point in particular is being investigated even
yet at home.” “Iam not unaware,” said he, “that
some think me a Chian, some a Smyrniote and many
a Colophonian. As a matter of fact, I am a Babylonian, and among my fellow-countrymen my name
was not Homer but Tigranes. Later on, when I was
a hostage ‘(homeros) among the Greeks, I changed my
name.” I went on to enquire whether the
bracketed lines had been written by him, and he
asserted that they were all his own: consequently I
held the grammarians Zenodotus and Aristarchus
guilty of pedantry in the highest degree. Since
he had answered satisfactorily on these points, I
next asked him why he began with the wrath of
Achilles; and he said that it just came into his
head that way, without any study. Moreover, I
wanted to know whether he wrote the Odyssey
before the Iliad, as most people say: he said no.
At about this time arrived Pythagoras of Samos
who had undergone seven transformations, had
lived in seven bodies and had now ended the migrations of his soul. All his right side was of gold.
Judgment was pronounced that he should become a
member of their community, but when I left
the point was still at issue whether he ought to be
called Pythagoras or Euphorbus. Empedocles came
too, all burned and his body completely cooked,
As time went on their games came round, the
Games of the Dead. The referees were Achilles,
serving for the fifth time, and Theseus for the
seventh. The full details would make a long story,
but I shall tell the principal things that they did.
In wrestling the winner was Caranus, the descendant
of Heracles, who defeated Odysseus for the championship. The boxing was a draw between Areius
the Egyptian, who is buried at Corinth, and Epeius.
For combined boxing and wrestling they offer no
Hardly had the games been concluded when word came that those who were under punishment in the place of the wicked had burst their bonds, had overpowered their guard, and were advancing on the island: that théy were under the leadership of Phalaris of Acragas, Busiris the Egyptian, Diomed of Thrace, and Sciron and Pityocamptes. When Rhadamanthus heard of this he mustered the heroes on the shore. They were led by Theseus, Achilles and Ajax, the son of Telamon, who by this time had recovered his wits. They engaged and fought, and the heroes won. Achilles contributed most to their success, but Socrates, who was stationed on the right wing, was brave, too—far more so than when’ he fought at - Delium in his lifetime. When four of the enemy came at him he did not run away or change countenance. For this they afterwards gave him a special reward, a beautiful great park in the suburbs, where he used to gather his comrades and dispute : he named the place the Academy of the Dead.
Arresting the losers and putting them in irons,
they sent them off to be punished still more severely
than before. An account of this battle was written
by Homer, and as I was leaving he gave me the
book to take to the people at home, but later I lost
it along with everything else. The poem began:
Six months had passed and it was about the middle of the seventh when sedition arose. Cinyras, the son of Scintharus, a tall and handsome lad, had long been in love with Helen, and it was no secret that she herself was madly enamoured of the boy. For instance, they often winked to one another at table, drank to each other and got up together and wandered about the wood. Well, one fine day through love and despair Cinyras determined to rape Helen—she agreed to it—and go to one of the islands in the offing, either Cork or Cheesie. As accomplices they had long ago taken on three of the most reckless of my comrades; but Cinyras did not inform his father, for he knew that he would not let him do it. When they had come to a decision, they carried out their stratagem. It was at nightfall, and I was not on hand, as I chanced to be taking a nap under the table. Without the knowledge of the rest they carried Helen off and put to sea in haste.
About midnight, when Menelaus woke up, and
found that his wife was not in bed, he made a
great stir and took his brother and went to King
Rhadamanthus. But as day began to break the
lookouts said that they saw the ship far out at sea.
Then Rhadamanthus put fifty of the heroes aboard a
The heroes voted, too, that we be dismissed from the island before our time was up, remaining only till the next day.
Thereupon I began to cry aloud and weep because
I had to leave such blessings behind me and resume
my wanderings. But they cheered me up, saying
that before many years I should come back to them
again, and they even pointed out to me my future
chair and couch, close to the best people. I went
to Rhadamanthus and earnestly besought him to tell
me what would happen and indicate my course. He
said that I should reach my native land in spite of
many wanderings and dangers, but refused to tell the
time of my return. However, pointing out the islands
near by—there were five in sight and a sixth in the
distance—, “These,” said he, “are the Isles of
the Wicked, here close at hand, from which you see
all the smoke arising: the sixth yonder is the City
of Dreams. Next comes the island of Calypso, but
With these words he plucked a root of mallow
from the ground and handed it to me, telling me to
pray to it in my greatest straits. And he advised me
if ever I reached this country, neither to stir the fire
with a sword-blade nor to eat lupines nor to make
love to anyone over eighteen,
Well, I made preparations for the voyage, and
when the time came, joined them at the feast. On
the next day I went to the poet Homer and begged
him to compose me a couplet to carve up, and when
he had done so, I set up a slab of beryl near the
harbour and had the couplet carved-onit. It was:
I stayed that day, too, and put to sea on the
next, escorted by the heroes. At that juncture
Odysseus came to me without ‘the knowledge of
Penelope and gave me a letter to carry to Ogygia
Island, to Calypso. Rhadamanthus sent the pilot
Nauplius with me, so that if we touched at the
Forging ahead, we had passed out of the fragrant atmosphere when of a sudden a terrible odour greeted us as of asphalt, sulphur, and pitch burning together, and a vile, insufferable stench as of roasting human flesh: the atmosphere was murky and foggy, and a pitchy dew distilled from it. Likewise we heard the noise of scourge$ and the wailing of many men.
The other islands’ we did not touch at, but the one on which we landed was precipitous and sheer on all sides ; it was roughened with rocks and stony places, and there was neither tree nor water in it. We crawled up the cliffs, however, and went ahead in a path full of thorns and calthrops, finding the country very ugly. On coming to the enclosure and the place of punishment, first of all we wondered at the nature of the region. The ground itself was all sown with sword blades and calthrops, and around it flowed three rivers, one of mud, the second of blood and the inmost one of fire. The latter was very large, and impossible to cross: it ran like water and undulated like the sea, and it contained many fish, some similar to torches, and some, a smaller variety, to live coals. They called them candlefish.
There was a single narrow way leading in, past all
the rivers, and the warder set there was Timon ot
Athens. We got through, however, and with
Nauplius for our conductor we saw many kings
undergoing punishment, and many commoners too.
Some of them we even recognized, and we saw Cinyras
Well, I turned back to the ship quickly, for I could not endure the sight, said good-bye to Nauplius, and sailed away.
After a short time the Isle of Dreams came
in sight close by, faint and uncertain to the eye. It
had itself some likeness to a dream, for as we
approached it receded and retired and retreated
to a greater distance. Overtaking it at length and
sailing into the harbour called Sleep, we landed near
the ivory gates, where the sanctuary of the Cock is,
about dusk, and on entering the city, we saw many
dreams of all sorts. But first I desire to speak of the
city itself, since no one else has written about it, and
Homer, the only one to mention it at all, was not
quite accurate in what he said.
On all sides of
it is a wood, in which the trees are tall poppies and
mandragoras, and they have a great number of bats
in them; for there is no other winged thing in the
island. A river flows near which they call Sleepwalker, and there are two springs by the gates,
As to the dreams themselves,
they differ from one another both in nature and in
looks. Some were tall, handsome and well-proportioned, while others were small and ugly; and
some were rich, I thought, while others were
humble and beggarly. There were winged and
portentous dreams among them, and there were
others dressed up as if for a carnival, being clothed to
represent kings and gods and different characters of
the sort. We actually recognised many of them,
whom we had seen long ago at home. These came
For thirty days and thirty nights we stopped with them and had a fine time—sleeping! Then of a ‘sudden a great thunder-clap came; we woke up, sprang out of bed and put to sea as soon as we had laid in supplies.
On the third day out from there we touched at the island of Ogygia and landed. But first I opened the letter and read what was in it. It was:
Odysseus to Calypso, greeting.
“Soon after I built the raft and sailed away from you I was shipwrecked, and with the help of Leucothea managed to reach the land of the Phaeacians in safety. They sent me home, and there I found that my wife had a number of suitors who were living on the fat of the land at our house. I killed them all, and was afterwards slain by Telegonus, my son by Circe. Now I am on the Isle of the Blest, thoroughly sorry to have given up my life with you and the immortality which you offered me. Therefore, if I get a chance, I shall run away and come to you.” In addition to this, the letter said. that she was to entertain us.
On going a short way from the
sea I found the cave, which was as Homer described
it,
After that, we went back to the ship and slept beside it on the shore.
Early in the morning we put to sea in a rising wind. We were stormtossed for two days, and on the third we fell in with the Pumpkin-pirates. They are savages from the neighbouring islands who prey on passing sailors. They have large boats.of pumpkin, sixty cubits long ; for after drying a pumpkin they hollow it out, take out the insides and go sailing in it, using reeds for masts and a pumpkin-leaf for a sail. They attacked us with two crews and gave us battle, wounding many of us by hitting us with pumpkin-seeds instead of stones. After fighting for a long time on even terms, about noon we-saw the Nut-sailors coming up astern of the Pumpkin-pirates. They were enemies to one another, as they showed by their actions ; for when the Pumpkin-pirates noticed them coming up, they neglected us and faced about and fought with them. But in the meantime we hoisted our canvas and fled, leaving them fighting.
It was evident that
the Nut-sailors would win, as they were in greater
In fact, the sun had not yet gone down when from a desert island there came out against us about twenty men riding on huge dolphins, who were pirates like the others. The dolphins carried them securely and plunged and neighed like horses. When they were close by, they separated and threw at us from both sides with dry cuttle-fish and crabs’ eyes. But when we let fly at them with spears and arrows, they could not hold their ground, but fled to the island, most of them wounded.
About midnight, while it was calm, we unexpectedly ran aground on an enormous kingfisher’s
nest; really, it was sixty furlongs in circumference.
The female was sailing on it, keeping her eggs
warm, and she was not much smaller than the
nest—in fact, as she started up she almost sunk the
ship with the wind of her wings. She flew off, however, uttering a plaintive cry. We landed when day
began to break, and observed that the nest was like
a great raft, built of huge trees. There were five
hundred eggs in it, every one of them bigger than a
Chian wine-jar, and the chicks were already visible
inside them and were chirping. We cut open one
When we had sailed a distance of two hundred
furlongs from the nest, great and wonderful signs
manifested themselves to us. The gooseneck
We had not
yet gone five hundred’ furlongs when we saw a very
large, thick forest of pines and cypresses. We
thought it was land, but in reality it was a
bottomless sea overgrown with rootless trees, in spite
of which the trees stood up motionless and straight,
as if they were floating. On drawing near and
forming an idea of the situation, we were in a
quandary what to do, for it was not possible to sail
between the trees, they being thick and close
together, nor did. it seem easy to turn back.
Climbing the tallest tree, I looked to see how things
were on the other side, and I saw that the forest
extended for fifty stades or a little more, and that
another ocean lay beyond. So we resolved to lift the
We managed the wood in spite of everything and reached the water. Lowering the ship again in the same way we sailed through pure, clear water, until we came to a great crevasse made by the water dividing, like the cracks that one often sees in the earth, made by earthquakes. Though we got in the sails, the ship was slow to lose headway and so came near being engulfed. Peering over the edge, we saw a precipice of fully a thousand furlongs, most frightful and unnatural—the water stood there as if cut apart! But as we looked about us we saw on the right at no great distance a bridge thrown across, which was of: water, joining the surfaces of the two seas and flowing from one to the other. Rowing up, therefore, we ran into the stream and by great effort got across, though we thought we should never do it.
Then we came to a smooth sea and an island
of no great size that was easily accessible and was
inhabited. -It was peopled by savages, the Bullheads, who have horns in the style that the
Already we began to see fish, birds flew by and
all the other signs that land was near made their
appearance. In a little while we saw men who were
In the evening we touched at another island of
no great size. It was inhabited by women—or so
we thought—who spoke Greek, and they came up
to us, welcomed and embraced us. They were got
up just like courtezans and were all beautiful and
young, with tunics that swept on the ground. The
island was called Witchery, and the city Watertown.
With all speed we went back to the ship and sailed away. When the light of day began to show, we saw land and judged it to be the world opposite the one which we inhabit. After doing homage and offering prayer, we took thought for the future. Some of us proposed just to land and then turn back again, others to leave the boat there, go into the interior and see what the inhabitants were like. While we were debating this, a violent storm struck the boat, dashed it ashore and wrecked it, and we ourselves had much trouble in swimming out with our arms and anything else that we could catch up.
Thus far I have told you what happened to me
until I reached the other world, first at sea, then